– These Shark Tank pitches
are swimming with the fishes. – (chuckles) Let’s talk about that. (funky electronic music) (fire crackles) Good Mythical Morning. – This fall, we’re releasing our new novel The Lost Causes of Bleak Creek,
but while you wait for that, you can watch our Tour
of Mythicality special, the stage show based on our first book, The Book of Mythicality. Get it on iTunes, YouTube, and Amazon. Info at tourofmythicality.com. – For 10 seasons, Shark Tank
has brought entrepreneurs to make business presentations
to a panel of investors, AKA the sharks. I enjoy watching this show
but I’m explaining it to you as if you’ve never seen it. The sharks then decide
if they want to invest their actual money into
the entrepreneurs’ idea. It’s a lot like the time
that Chase pitched us on his idea for edible fireworks. – Right, but not all ideas are as good as Chase’s fire snackers. (chuckles) In fact, some are laughably
bad and today we determine the worst Shark Tank inventions ever. It’s time for Ranked: Worst
Shark Tank Inventions Ever. Welcome to the rank tank. Mythical Team Member
Stevie, Christine, Jordan and Emily have each picked
what they believe is the worst Shark Tank invention ever. – Yep and their job is
to convince us to agree with them, all right,
Christine let’s start with you. (laughing) I think I want you to start. – I will gladly start for you. The inventions that I chose is Ionic Ear. It’s a Bluetooth device
that is surgically implanted into your ear canal.
– What? – Which makes perfect sense
and it’s not at all crazy. But here’s the pitch. – If I could direct your
attention to the first slide. Here’s the surgery locations. This is just underneath the ear lobe. – Is that the surgery location? – This is surgery, you
would be under anesthesia. (laughing) – [Robert] So you stick that needle in your head every night to charge it? – Yes you would.
– Okay you don’t think– – Whoa whoa whoa–
– You don’t think– – Oh my God. (laughing) Seriously, a needle?
– It’s like a small Q-tip cylinder that would dock– – What happens if you miss, Darren? – You can’t miss.
– You can’t miss. – (laughs) You can’t miss. You definitely don’t wanna miss. – What?
– Oh. – So the fun thing is
that he actually does all of the surgeries. (laughing) – Now I feel better.
– It’s good to see Dr. Duntsch in person.
– Exactly. So he was seeking a
million dollar investment for a 50% equity in his crazy company. Only members of the Blue
Man Group as seen here. (laughing)
It was a show and– – We have met the Blue Men in person, and they’re too smart for this. – But I don’t know, it just
seems like a crazy invention. The fact that you have to charge
your ear every single night and it’s named the implanted, like, if I was gonna pay for implants
it definitely wouldn’t be into my brain, right?
– Okay. – But I really like the acronym. IEIBBD. (chuckles) – That’s not an acronym,
that’s just a new word. – Iebbd.
– Iebbd. – Ieddb.
– Ieddb. – So they of course funded this. – No they did not, everyone
was just like you’re crazy. Do not do this.
– Okay. – I don’t know.
– The pitch isn’t going well when someone says,
“Seriously,” three times. – Yeah yeah yeah.
– So all he has to show for his invention is this
placard which we now have. – Yes.
– Okay. So we’re gonna put this, it is the worst that I’ve heard so far. – That’s fair.
– And one is closest, so there it is. – Okay, who’s next? – Me and I have a question for you. Do you hate squirrels
but wanna be the boss? (laughing) Watch this clip.
– Oh gosh. – But with Squirrel Boss, if you see a squirrel on your bird feeder and he wears out his welcome, just press the remote control and deliver a harmless
static shock correction. (laughing) That is similar to
walking across the carpet and touching something. – Buh-bam! – It tingles but it doesn’t hurt you. Who would like to challenge
the Squirrel Boss? (whimsical music) – I don’t feel anything. (tense music) (zaps)
(yelps) (laughing) – Dang. It looked like it took his hand off. – You see how that works? – They were way too excited. – If you’ll notice, there’s
two parts to the Squirrel Boss. You have part one. – Oh gosh. – But I have part two. – Oh no. – So in order to really get the full– – Link, I’m holding it. Am I gonna get shocked
by holding it up here? – No you have–
– Good. – You have to touch two coils. I recommend just like a peace sign maybe. You peace sign, just peace sign that guy. – Ow! (laughing) – Yes.
– Now listen– – Squirrel Boss! – I walked a bunch of carpets in my day and touched something that
that hurts a lot worse. That is cruel to a squirrel. – Well the weird thing
is that you have to be a nice enough person to
put out food for birds but then hate squirrels, like
you hate other small animals but you wanna feed other small animals. – Yeah you’re talking
about my father-in-law. – Well that’s an other–
– I’m gonna give him this. – [Stevie] Disappointing thing is that– – He’s a masochist. – This remote was made for old people. There’s one button but
so is the Life Alert. – Is it that big?
– You know what I’m saying? – You get those things confused. – Yes, you’re just pushing one button. You’re just shocking squirrels,
meanwhile you’re dying. You know, that’s all I’m saying. – And you have to be watching the feeder. – Oh yeah well this is–
– Oh yeah. – You have to be like
(grunts), I don’t know. Get ’em honey, get ’em.
– Yeah I mean, I’m not gonna lie, it sounds like fun but I’m not gonna say that
I would actually do it because that’s not good for my brand. – You should just do what
my grandfather-in-law did which he would capture squirrels and then paint their tails
red and let them loose on the other side of town
and if they came back, then he would kill ’em. – [Stevie] Wow. – Yeah or you could just
stab ’em with pitch forks. – Okay I don’t know. Because this one could hurt me. This one’s gonna hurt a squirrel, I don’t think it’s as bad as the Aebbd. – Did they fund it? – Well the crazy thing is–
– Because that makes a difference in my mind. – They re-branded it Squirrel
Baus and then thousands of teen girls just went and bought it. – Yas, yas Squirrel Boss. (laughing) – [Rhett] Lilly Singh got behind it, huh? – Did they fund it? – No.
– Okay. – No, why would I be
presenting that to you? No.
– I don’t think you have to ask that question
again the next two times. – I mean I’m thinking about funding it. – All right Emily, what do we got? – All right so I chose Elephant Chat. Do you have issues speaking to your spouse about basic stuff?
(Christine laughs) – Sure.
– Well guess what. I got, I’m gonna fix
it with Elephant Chat. There you go. – No one Likes those we
need to talk conversations. – But they are necessary.
– And most of the time, you don’t know that you
need to have that talk until you start getting the cold shoulder and end up sleeping on the couch. – Until now.
– Introducing the elephant in the room. – [Daymond] Oh Lord. (panel laughing) – So when I see the toilet
seat has been left up for the millionth time,
I don’t have to be ready to pounce on him when he walks to the door or be mad when he doesn’t
realize I’m upset. I simply remove the cover and reveal the elephant in the room. – And one of the best
rules about Elephant Chat is that you can only talk if
you’re holding the elephant. (Rhett chuckles) – Wanna be taken seriously? (chuckles) – Hold an elephant.
– Oh, very nice. – Oh it’s blue. – And it’s got plenty of
room just like at every zoo where I’ve seen an elephant. – And just like in his marriage probably. – Hold on so all you do to
say I got a problem is this? – You just leave it in a room. Well what’ll probably happen is, he’s never gonna use this thing. – He’s oblivious.
– He’s not using it. This is for her.
– Yes. – I think it’s very clear.
– Yes. – Also, her eyes are insane. Do you know those wife eyes
are, she just walks in there and she’s like– (laughing) But I don’t think I could fully pitch this without my work husband helping me out. By the way did you buy more Red Vines? – No I didn’t buy more Red Vines. Get off my jock, I was riding my jet skis! (Rhett laughs) – [Rhett] All two of ’em. (laughs fearfully) – We’re also working on, so
the elephant in the room means we need to talk. The dalmatian in the room
means it’s time to try our sexy fireman role play. – Yes. (laughing) – [Jordan] There’s two stuffed animals. – Which I bet is horrible for him. – So is there a break
in case of emergency, kinda like–
– That’s a great idea. – This is the divorce signal.
– That’s what’s implied. That’s what I don’t understand. – [Emily] I love that. – Yeah I guess if you come
home and the elephant’s head is separated from the body, then that means you’re in trouble. – Yeah you put that in the bed. – Sure, yeah.
– And let him wake up– – Yeah Godfather style.
– Yeah yeah Godfather style, but yeah if they wanted
to sell it for $59– – Oh my God.
– And my favorite thing is Jason and Amanda are their names. She is such an Amanda, raved– – (laughs) Oh gosh. – 100,000, sorry Amandas. Raised $100,000 from local friends to get this venture off the ground. I think it was to get them out of town. If you don’t, every dinner party, those people are the worst. – Yeah. – They’re probably in fights in public. – Oh gosh yes.
– Okay let’s figure out where to rank this thing because it’s– – [Emily] It doesn’t do anything. – [Link] I mean I like
relationship building. I like–
– It can’t hurt you. – Communication is important. No actual elephants are
hurt in the process. I mean just in terms
of pain, I don’t know. There’s a lot of emotional
pain wrapped up in that box. – Jordan, you failed me and we’re gonna have a
conversation about this later. – I don’t know–
(team chuckling) The Squirrel Boss is still very
functional though, you know? – Yeah. – I can’t argue with that.
– Okay Jordan. – Okay so these are all very bad products. But–
– Thank you. (Emily chuckles) – They’re very bad. I noticed they were very bad. You guys did a good job
bringing bad products. But I have the absolute worst. It’s a business idea called I
Want To Draw A Cat For You– – [Rhett] Oh. – And I should probably just
let the guy who had the idea take it away. ♪ I want to draw a cat for you ♪ (quirky music) ♪ I’ll draw you a cat
that’s short and fat ♪ ♪ I’ll draw you a cat
with a pork pie hat ♪ ♪ I’ll draw you a cat, whatever the vibe ♪ ♪ I draw the cat that you describe ♪ (quirky music)
(panel laughing) ♪ I want to draw a cat for you ♪ ♪ I want to draw a cat for you ♪ ♪ I want to draw a cat for you ♪ I want to draw a cat for you. – Okay dude, okay, draw a frickin’ cat. – From a price that ranges
from $9.95 to $19.95, he will draw any cat you describe. – What?
– And do a– – This is a service?
– Yeah. – Where you pay him money
and he draws you a cat? – He draws you a cat, and
we actually reached out to him and he drew some
custom Rhett and Link cats. – No.
– What? Look at this. To Rhett and Link, welcome
to the internet, ma’am. (team laughing) – Okay, so that is based on
your Chocolate Fountain episode and I think what–
– This is me in the chocolate fountain. – Yeah what he was actually saying was, “Welcome to the internet, fam.” But he misheard it and wrote ma’am. – Yeah that is not what I said. (Stevie laughing) – But it somehow makes it worth more. – [Jordan] Yeah. – So this is like a $19.95 job. – Exactly, yes, this is a $19.95 one. – Two cats and an error.
– Yes. There’s also, there’s a
second verse to that song. It goes ♪ I want to live alone for life ♪ ♪ I want to live alone for life ♪ (laughing) – I mean, I legitimately
thought that he was pitching some sort of board game Pictionary thing but not like a one-man service. – Yeah, no you just send him
money and he draws something and then mails it to you. – You don’t have to like
meet him on a pier somewhere. – (laughs) Right, it seems
like a back alley hand-off. That’s if you want the
cat licking its butt hole, then there’s a special–
(laughing) You gotta meet him
behind the Bob’s Big Boy. (laughing) He will not sit–
– Behind the Big Boy for the butt hole lick.
– Okay, okay. All right. – So yeah, Mark Cuban offered
$25,000 for a 33% stake in the company and he took the deal so– – No! This is happening?
– Hold on. Mark Cuban did this? – Yes, Mark Cuban did. – Can’t argue with that guy.
– Yeah. – I don’t know.
– He’s rich. – Pretty big cheese ball
in like all of these clips, he’s like hey hey! – I want you to draw some cats for me. – He uses a lot of finger
guns I feel like, Mark Cuban. – Okay I mean, who gets hurt in this? Does a squirrel, does
an elephant or does a– – I guess art gets hurt.
– Relationship on the rocks. – Well this is a proven
business model though, having people draw something
for you for a small fee. It’s not a great idea. But I don’t think it’s the
worst idea that’s ever been on Shark Tank. I think that’s got to me, oh, okay. – [Link] I’m just, I can’t
reach three or four yet. I’m listening. – Okay well I feel like we
should move the Squirrel Boss all the way down to number four. – No.
– Because, I mean again, setting aside the fact
that squirrels everywhere are being shocked by it, it actually is accomplishing the purpose that the person buys it for, probably pretty effectively, right? You wanna shock the squirrels, do you wanna be the boss of squirrels? There’s the Squirrel Boss. – Are we making a moral
judgment that it’s okay by putting it at number four?
– Yes. – No we’re just saying it’s the intention of the customer when
they buy it is fulfilled. So I think that–
– What? You don’t think that’s a cat drawing? – [Rhett] Yeah that’s
why it’s number three. – Don’t be jealous ’cause he
didn’t draw a cat for you, Stevie. – Well I don’t need any cat drawings. – But I mean this, it’s
one thing to hear about a bad idea, it’s another
thing to have the idea put into your own ear. – And then you have to
charge your ear every night. – [Rhett] Yeah you know what I’m saying. – I like the idea but as a prank, you can find someone who has that and pair your phone to their Bluetooth and then just rocket Hall
and Oates into their face at two in the morning. – Yeah it can be abused. It’s the worst idea in this– – [Jordan] I hope you like Staind! – I would like that,
so let’s work together. But yes the IEIBBD Implant Ionic-Ear Injected
Bluetooth Base Device is the worst Shark Tank
invention that we heard about this morning.
– Yes. Thank you for all those bad ideas though and thank you for liking,
commenting and subscribing. – Now you guys say you
know what time it is. – [Mythical Team] You
know what time it is. – Eureka! From the Eureka, Montana billboard and it’s time to spin
the Wheel of Mythicality. – Whoa. – (chuckles) It’s a family affair. – That family’s having some fun. Click the top link to watch
us the Mythical Team Member to their favorite reality
show in Good Mythical More. – And to find out where the Wheel of Mythicality’s gonna land. So many Mythical badges, so little time. Collect them all at Mythical.store.