The Kapil Sharma Show Season 2 – Ep 97 – Full Episode – 7th December, 2019

The Kapil Sharma Show Season 2 – Ep 97 – Full Episode – 7th December, 2019


Ms. Archana, the battle
of Panipat was very frightful. You must have
witnessed it. I mean, you must have
read in the history. I had experienced it
very closely. It is believed
that history repeats itself. We will get to witness
the battle of Panipat. Wow! – Not in real.
But in the cinema. Thank God. People are ready to watch
the battle if it is for free. All of you know that the film
‘Panipat’ is getting released. And the star cast of this film
are going to join us. Firstly, I will like to invite
very stylish very handsome, our favourite
superstar, Mr. Sanjay Dutt. Sir, welcome to our show. We are lucky to have him
for the second time in this season. Thank you very much. Sir, how do you feel when people applaud for you
wherever you go? They shout out
and shower love. I haven’t seen anyone get
so much love. How does it feel? Do you like the feeling?
– I enjoy it. I feel happy
to get so much love. People respect me. Thank you.
Thank you so much. Sir, the last time
you came here we had the highest
TRP. 4.1. 4.1. Thank you. When we had got
the highest TRP.. The channel celebrates
all the time.. They respect us. They got three dresses
stitched for Ms. Archana. His film ‘Panipat’
is releasing soon. All of you must have
watched the trailer. You are looking amazing. You look great in all
the characters that you play. Thank you. – Sir, you are
doing a film based on the battle of Panipat..
– Yes. Tell me the truth. Did you
know about it in the school or you learnt about it
after doing the film? I knew about Panipat.
– That’s all. You didn’t know
about the battle? No.
Nothing. Did you not study history
in school? I had studied
but I used to score very less. Which subject were you
weak in? In all the subjects. Like he is saying
that he was weak in studies. He hasn’t studied history. But, God has blessed you
that people read about you. A lot of people
get to learn something from you. Your journey
has been inspiring. People play different roles
in fancy dress competition. They become Gandhiji,
Chacha Nehru, Bhagat Singh.. Sir, did you ever
participate in a fancy dress? I used to do plays. But, I always got to play
the helper. They used to have
such well-built helper. You would be tall
even in school. I was tall. My name was Dhaniram
in a play. Dhaniram? Dhaniram. Okay.
– Gulab Chand. Wow! Such great names. You got to play these
characters. – Yes. The owner wouldn’t look
like an owner. He would look
like your helper. Mr. Sanjay, you and
Mr. Sunny Deol.. When I see the two of you,
I feel as if no one could raise
their hands against you. But have you ever been given
a punishment in school? Of course. I have been punished
and beaten. – Wow. I see. I thought it never
happened in rich schools. No.. I was given
punishment. I see.
– Should I show you? Please do. Let me tell you something.
Yoga is really famous now. Foreigners are doing it.
– Yes. Our people are a bit lazy. But we started doing it
at school. – Absolutely right.. That stance strengthens
our hamstrings. I mean, it strengthens
your glutes. So, you should do it
whenever you get time at home. There is nothing
wrong about it. Mr. Sanjay, I have another
question about school. The kids wanted me to
ask this to you. Have you ever forged
Mr. Sunil Dutt’s signature on your mark sheet?
– Wow. I have done
that numerous times. Numerous times?
– Even that of my mom. Signatures of both your parents?
– Yes. I never had my signature
on mark sheets. – I see. I have forged my parents’
signature. Even that of my teacher. You forged your parents’
signature to show your teacher and vice versa.
– Absolutely. Haven’t your teacher said that
she wants to meet your parents? They had come to meet
my teachers. – I see. My mom.. Have you seen
western movies? Yes..
– Western. She used to beat me
with her slippers as Clint Eastwood would.. It was.. Did your father punish you?
– Oh, God! A lot. Really?
– I see. – A lot. I had the privilege to meet
Mr. Sunil Dutt once. Obviously, he’d not beat me
in our first meeting. I want to know if Mr. Dutt
would get angry at you. He would and he used to beat
me with belts. – Wow. What?
– Yes. – Really? Literally. But..
– What did you do? Mischief.
A lot. Oh. Sir, your movie, ‘Sanju’,
was a super hit. That shows the love
people have for you. He didn’t act in the movie.
Ranbir Kapoor portrayed his character. People loved that movie.
In that movie, we saw that you had 308 girlfriends! Even divine necklaces
have only 108 beads! Sir, do you remember at what age
you had your first girlfriend? I was really young.
– I see. And she was
my neighbour’s friend. – I see. So, you started
with your neighbourhood! Yes. I.. My necklace has 308 beads! I-It isn’t over it.
There could be more. Oh! Wow. Sir, I love you! The fact that
you had 308 girlfriends.. Did your wife know it or she
found out from the movie.. Was she taken aback? When the movie was released,
she asked me. I see. – I told her it was
in the past and I asked her to forget it. She might have asked
if you are in touch with anyone amongst those 308.
As a friend. No.. I am not in touch
with anyone. I see. – I touch
but I am not in touch. Give a loud round of applause
of Mr. Sanjay. – Thank you. Please come.
Welcome! Almost everyone
has seen ‘Sanju.’ Sir, the movie depicts how you
started a radio programme in jail. You used to
make furniture as well. You also used to make
envelopes using newspapers. How long did it take you to
learn everything? Kapil, I took quite some time. It’s compulsory to work
in jail. – I see. One would get points..
– Couldn’t you make excuses like you aren’t well?
– No.. If the sentence has to be
reduced, one has to work. I see.
– Oh. I made one tenth of a Rupee
for every paper bag. I see.
– I see. It was good money. What did you do with the money
you made in prison? I want to tell you that I saved
the money so that I could give it to
my sisters on ‘Raksha Bandhan.’ How sweet! I am a huge fan of yours.
‘Khalnayak’ was released when I was in the eighth
or ninth grade. Back then, its tickets were sold
in black market in Amritsar. I saw it when it
was played in a local hall. I see.
– We went to watch ‘Khalnayak’ and the first part of the movie
was played. After 10 p.m, another movie
was played. We were so crazy about it. Jokes and fun will go on. I want to ask you something.
Today’s youth.. A lot of them are addicted
to drugs. Some of them
have started to do it. They enjoy it in the beginning
as they don’t know the result. What would you
like to tell those youngsters, Mr. Sanjay? I want to say that I have always
been against drugs. I have been through that phase.
– I see. So, be high on life.
Be high on work. You should be addicted
to your work to your parents,
and to your family. Enjoy being high on life. Love you, sir.
– Thank you, Kapil. We will keep this conversation
going on with Mr. Sanjay but now it’s time to invite the beautiful and talented
actress of this movie. Please welcome, very talented
and very beautiful Kriti Sanon! Welcome, Kriti. – Thank you.
– Welcome.. Thank you.. Hi! – How are you?
– Give a big hand to Kriti and our artists.
– How are you? Kriti, you look lovely.
– Thank you. She recently came here
for ‘Housefull 4’. Congratulations to you.
– Thank you. It was a huge hit. Come, Kriti.
A very warm welcome to you. Kriti, I saw
the trailer of ‘Panipat’. Mr. Sanjay looks lethal
in Abdali’s character. And you look lovely
as Queen Parvati. Thank you.. Sir, do you know
Ahmad Shah Abdali’s role was first offered
to Ms. Archana? She made a small mistake. You know, Abdali’s costume
had many chains on it! Yes. – Yes. – She took out
a few of those chains attached them to locks
and sold them at the airport. The production team
got to know about it, so.. Your imagination is superb. Wow!
– I mean, what can I say! I actually started imagining you
in Abdali’s role. Now he will say
that in ‘Agneepath’ I was supposed to play
Kancha Cheena, right? This is all we can imagine. After all, I don’t have
308 girlfriends. The sari that Kriti
is wearing in ‘Panipat’ is nine meters long. Normally.. Ms. Archana’s towel
is 12 meters long. – 9 yards. In the morning
she uses it as a towel and at night
she uses it as her bedsheet. Yes! – Anyway,
it’s an exceptional case. Normally a sari is
six meters long. – Six meters. Her sari was nine meters long and on top of that
she was using a sword. What was more difficult? To handle
a nine meters long sari or to use a sword? To handle a sword
while wearing Nauvari. Sword fighting
while wearing a sari! – Yes. Because when I was rehearsing or when I was practising I would wear track pants and tank top..
– It was easy. Track pants and sports shoes.
That’s how I would practise. When I reached on the sets.. A sari obviously restricts
your movements. You cannot move
with that much ease. Plus there was sand,
I mean dry sand. And, the sequence is such that everyone is trying
to throw sand purposely. Okay. – To block
other people’s vision. Even our vision
was getting blocked. We couldn’t see anything. So, we had to do it properly and also ensure
that nobody gets hurt because after all
it was all acting. Whether Mr. Sanjay plays a hero
or a villain.. No matter what he does,
he fits the role. Sir, why didn’t you work
in your own biopic? Why didn’t you?
You know, you are.. I mean, did they ask you
to play the character! No, they didn’t offer me
the role. But how many movies can I do? That’s a valid point. Right? We should let
others also perform. Of course. Actually, I don’t know
if he has told you all but ‘Panipat’
is his 200th movie. Oh!
– You’ve done 200 movies! Wow!
– Wow! Thank you. Is the count confirmed
or it can vary a little? It’s as confirmed as 308 figure. Sir, if you had to act
in a biopic whose biopic would you choose? I would.. Whom would I choose? Donald Trump would be fine. Yes! He is quite blunt.
He can say anything. Anything!
– Actually.. – That’s how he is! One fine day,
I saw on Twitter.. I don’t know
how much you follow it. The president of North Korea,
Kim Jong-un. He wrote that he has
a nuclear bomb and its button is placed
on his table. Then, Trump replied to him that even he has the button
on his table and it’s much bigger. And they are fighting like kids. It’s scary.
– So, I thought if two such powerful presidents
can do all this on Twitter then what I did
was nothing at all! Sir has not only played
amazing heroes on screen but also lethal villains. And I would like to ask
our audience.. Because we all have heroes
and villains in our lives. For example, many wives think that their husbands
are always on phone so a phone could be
a villain in their life. So, you can share
your amazing stories with us. Yes, sir. Hello, Mr. Kapil.
– Hello, sir. How are you? I am good, sir.
– Where are you from? I am from Vashi
and my name is Rakesh Harjai. Rakesh..
– You look very happy. Very happy, right?
– Yes, indeed. – So nice! One should be happy in life. Sir, I forgot your name. My name is Rakesh Harjai. Rakesh. – Rakesh?
– Harjai! Harjai! What does Harjai mean? It means..
– Someone who steals your heart. Someone who steals your heart.
– Disloyal, right? Someone who steals hearts.
– Who steals hearts! He looks like some who can
steal hearts. – Wow! I think he steals quilts. Okay. So, Mr. Harjai,
what’s your story? Every time, I plan a weekend
with my wife my in-laws..
– Yes. They call up and say
that they’re not keeping well and I should send
their daughter to them. So, my whole..
– Is your wife a doctor? Is your wife a doctor?
– No. She isn’t a doctor.
– Then why do they call her? I don’t know why this happens.
I would like to know. Then, what do you do? What can I do? I send my wife there otherwise I get thrashed. Who falls more sick,
father-in-law or mother-in-law? Mostly it’s mother-in-law. I guess your father-in-law
isn’t romantic. So, you are trying to say
that your in-laws are villains in your life.
– Villains, yes! Very bravely you shared it here.
– Yes. How much time does it take
to reach Vashi? Sir, it takes an hour. I am an astrologer as well. After an hour, your life
will become miserable. Thanks a lot.
– Thank you, sir. Anyone else? Yes, ma’am. Hello, Kapil.
– Hello. How are you? Hello, Ms. Archana.
– Hello. – Hello, Ms. Kriti. Hi!
– Hello, Mr. Sanjay. Sir, my name is Neha
and I’m from Navi Mumbai. Welcome.
– Thank you, sir. Sir, in my husband’s life
I am a villain. Why? I stop him from doing
whatever he wants to do. That’s what he thinks. You are not the only one
who is like this. I mean, this is.. I wish this was possible. I think that would be better because.. After all, you are married
to each other. If you love each other then let your husband do
what he loves. Is this..
– Please, it’s a request. Is this for your wife or others? Seems like, this message
is meant for your home. Look, smart people
don’t need explanations. So.. – But, sir..
– I hope she is smart. Yes. – Sir, but there are
certain problems. He makes plans with his friends. Okay. – And then he seeks
my permission. Then, I don’t allow him. Okay. – Because he forgot
our wedding anniversary. Oh my.. And he’s still alive! Sir, greetings. Sir, what are these things
that she doesn’t let you do but you want to do? Sir, I like to go out. Travelling? – Yes, I love that.
– Even I love travelling. And she doesn’t let me do that. Do you like to travel solo? I can go solo
and also with others. With others? – Even with my wife
but she doesn’t tag along. You mean,
you start from home alone and then you pick someone
on the way? No..
– Yes. I would just say that be careful
and don’t get caught. No, sir. We have been married
for 16 years. Okay and you have
never been caught! No, sir.
Why would I get caught? Okay. I mean,
you are trying to say that you never made a mistake or you never let her be upset.
Right? I have tried my best
to not make her upset. But still she gets upset.
– Yes, she does sometimes. Then you should make a mistake. But, sir, when he goes out
with friends he returns home
after having food and drinks. Sir, I..
– Regular story! It’s good that even after
being drunk he returns home and doesn’t go anywhere else. Thank you for coming here.
– We love you, Kapil. Thank you.
Love you too. Thank you. Is there anyone else who would
like to share a story? You should go to school.
Why are you here? Yes. Hello, little girl.
How are you? Hello, Mr. Kapil. – Hello.
– Hello, Mr. Sanjay. Hello, Kriti.
– Hi. Hello, Ms. Archana.
– Hi, dear. So, in my life
main villain is my dad. Hello, father with a tattoo.
– Many people have tattoos here. You didn’t mention your name. My name is Kanak. Kanak? – Yes.
– Okay. What does your father..
You’re calling him a villain! Yes, he is! Why?
– Because.. I can manipulate
my mom and brother. If I wish to play for long hours
they never say anything. Okay.
– But, my father catches all my lies. I think, he ruins my plans. He is not a villain.
He is smart. For me he is a villain. Kids think that their parents
do not let them play and ask them to study so they are villains but after a certain age when you will have
a self-realisation that your parents.. Your parents are the only ones
who expect nothing from you. Once you grow up
you will realise this. Yes, actually I am a fan
of all of you. Thank you. – And I want
to be a celebrity. Okay.
– An actress! I want to sit there
once I grow up. I want to talk to you. A famous celebrity
like Ms. Kriti and Deepika Padukone. Sir, I would like to deliver
a dialogue from her movie. Please. ‘Rajput!’ ‘Rajput is the one..’ ‘Who keeps tension at the tip
of his sword is a Rajput.’ ‘The one to challenge the ocean
in the darkness of night’ ‘is Rajput!’ ‘The one whose body
keeps fighting the enemies’ ‘even after losing the head
is Rajput!’ ‘The bangles of Rajput women
are as powerful’ ‘as the swords of their men.’ Amazing, Kanak.
– So cute! Thank you. You are so young
and so confident. When I was of your age
I was so timid that I wouldn’t show myself
to any guest visiting my house. What a dialogue, Kanak! You are very confident
and lovely. Thank you.
– You must obey your parents. Once you grow up
you can do whatever you want. Yes..
– May all your dreams come true. That’s it. – Thank you.
– All the best. Thank you. Okay, is there anyone else? Yes, sir. Greetings, sir. Greetings!
– Greetings! Give him the mic. We.. Started from Canada and covered a distance
of 21,000 kilometers along with our team having people
from various countries to celebrate 550 years
of Guru Nanak. From Kartarpur we reached
to Sultanpur Lodhi and now we are in Bombay. Welcome, sir. Along with me
is Sardar Gurcharan Singh. Greetings. – And his wife..
– Greetings. Ms. Surjeet Kaur. He is Mr. Ranjeet Singh.
– Greetings. We hired a special bus and travelled for 70 days.. You came here by bus!
– Yes, by bus! Wow, that’s amazing!
– By bus.. – 70 days! Whoever utters
shall be fulfilled.. Eternal is the Holy! We saw the previous episode.
– Yes. You invited all those singers and honoured our community. We are thankful for that.
– Sir, it’s an honour. If you allow..
– Yes, sir. We would like
to offer you something. Sir, I wanted to ask you
something. – Yes. You said that you travelled
for 70 days to reach here. Yes. Sir, I have a friend
who travelled here from London by road.
– Okay. They said that when you
enter Afghanistan.. I guess back then
it was Taliban. She said that they would
stop you there and she suggested that one should carry
the CDs of Bollywood movies. If anyone stops you,
give them the CDs and they will let you go. Sir, you travelled
so many countries. Didn’t you face any problem? We didn’t face any problem. First of all we covered
North America. We covered a distance
of around 12,000 kilometers. Then, Vancouver..
– Wow! – California and many other countries.
– I saw it on news. Okay. – That a group
had started from there and that it would arrive
in India. I didn’t know
that we would meet like this. It was great to meet all of you. Thank you. Come..
– Thank you. Please come. So, in order to know about
Panipat history in some more detail, let’s invite the one who
has adapted it into a movie. With a loud round of applause,
please welcome the director of super hit movies like ‘Lagaan’,
‘Swades’ and ‘Jodha Akbar’ Sir, mostly you make
historical movies. – Yes. You make expensive films
that are multi-star cast ones. Do you really like history or do
you want to make the producer spend more? I am fortunate because my wife
is my producer. – Right. Wow! – So, actually, my movie’s
budget and household budget is in her hands.
– With her. So, she knows how to mix
the two of them. From where to get money
and invest in our movie. I see! Our wives are very good
at money management. Since you’ve handed over
that department to her you are able to work peacefully. Sir, normally, people make
movies from a business point of view thinking..
‘I’ll make a movie of so much’ ‘budget.
So much budget for music..’ ‘By doing these things,
my movie will be safe.’ When you plan to make a movie,
I don’t think you keep this in mind. Because your movie starts from
where we forget the amount. Do you know, sir? You find many people
in our generation who recollect history through your movies. Dinesh, our guitarist’s nephew was having his history exam. There was a question
to write about Akbar. He wrote that Akbar was
a very good philosopher. See what he wrote after that. He used to always say,
“We live for a moment.” “Then we must depart.” “Oh, heart, tell me! What gift
can I take with me?” His teacher called him and told,
‘What rubbish your nephew’ ‘has written!’ Hear what happened after that. He said, ‘You wrote this!
You didn’t add this step.’ But it’s a fact, sir, we don’t
remember the historical events. They become vague in our mind. On watching your movies,
they get refreshed. But there are some people who
have nothing to do with history. Some people even oppose
about trivial matters. But despite that, you make
movies on such superb subjects. So proud of you, sir! Kapil, how sweet you are!
Thank you.. I was just reading your article
in ‘Bombay Times’ yesterday. First of all, congratulations
to me for reading ‘Bombay Times’ in English. It was written that 2,600
or 2,800 sets of jewellery.. Original ones were used
in the movie in order to show its authenticity..
How much hard work and detailing has gone into the movie. One of your men must be counting
that 2,800 jewellery sets in the evening. Were you getting them all back
or would something be missing? It could be missing.
It’s a very responsible job. The day my wedding sequence
was shot, there was so much jewellery that my sari
was not visible. – Oh! – I see! After a while, I thought
I won’t be able to breathe. But I felt like running away. One incident that would happen
was every actor is a king or a lord or an emperor. They have their own jewellery.
– Right. Until they wore the jewellery,
they wouldn’t find the reason to get into the character. So, without the jewellery, they
always felt very vacant. I think jewellery became a very
important part of the film. Of Parvatibai, especially.
– Yes. – Right. And Mohnish Bahl..
– I’ve a complaint. – Yes, sir. You didn’t want to wear them?
– My crown.. It was made
of cardboard. – Oh! – I see! Everyone was made
to wear the jewellery and me, the cardboard! So, it’s a nice thing, right?
You were given something light. Yes, you are right. – They used
to wear heavy crowns. – Really! Sir, be honest. The heavy
costume that you’ve worn.. With chains, the iron one
that I was referring to.. At that point, if you want
to relieve yourself were the costumes of that era
comfortable or the ones that you are wearing now? Of course, the one that
I’m wearing now. – Obviously. The current one. I keep wondering how
they would do it! Actually, suppose Abdali is on
the horse and is ready to attack and.. The best part is the horse
can do it and not Abdali. But actually if Abdali is on
the horse and on top of it if there’s a pressure, won’t
his expression become like this? When a person is standing and.. Sometimes, I love detailing. I’ve noticed many cricketers. When they are standing
on the pitch their posture becomes like this. I feel that when Abdali makes
such expression, his opponent will know that Abdali
is going to attack. He won’t compromise
because his expression.. And it would be
very difficult, sir. To remove the heavy iron armour. To remove the accessories. By then, you’ll come to know
that it’s not required anymore. You may feel the action that you watch on screen as easy. Right.
– Right. Because we are not going
on horses or elephants to kill someone.
We’ve shown actual real raw action. But when you are doing that act, it’s dusty, it’s hot. And the armour..
Sir, how heavy was it? Oh, my God!
– How heavy was it? It weighed 25 kg.
– Oh, my God! His problem was that he had
an armour weighing 25 kg. His own weight..
The horse is not used to that. Oh!
– So, it used to wonder ‘I’m supposed to carry the groom
from one place to another.’ ‘Where am I standing in hot sun
with such a heavy weight?’ And secondly, the horses
had become very sensible. On saying ‘action’.. – Action..
– They used to start moving. I see! So, we used to not tell it.
– We couldn’t’ tell ‘action’. When the horses were on the set,
we used to not tell ‘action’. So, at least, in our scenes,
we used to say.. – ‘Sadashiv’. ‘Sadashiv’. ‘Sadashiv’ meant
‘action’ for us. – I see. We used to manipulate
the horses. There was a sequence in which
Abdali was making an entry on the elephant. And it had to enter like this,
turn left and sit. Oh, God! – I see.
– It didn’t obey me. Why would it obey you? You can’t even scold it.
– Right. Can anyone scold an elephant? Your case is different..
A common man.. I was just.. He made me sit on the elephant.
– Then? – Not the walking one the running one. When I was sitting on it,
what do you call that? A howdah. The howdah was leaning
to the side. So, I was getting tense. I mean, the shot was.. I was sitting there
and he came running to me. He said, ‘Sanjay,
don’t look tense’. ‘You are Abdali.
You are like a king.’ ‘You got to sit like a king.’ What do I tell him?
That thing was.. I just told Sanjay, ‘This time,
when you enter, look up.’ ‘Even if you’re feeling
scared..’ – Your eyes won’t be seen. ‘Your eyes won’t be seen
and it would look like’ ‘you are riding majestically.’ That’s fine,
but what about this.. Sir, you’ve made many
historical films like ‘Jodha Akbar’
and ‘Panipat’. You used many horses
and elephants. The horses must have started
recognising you by now. Right? Maybe they discuss
among themselves. He’s the same guy
from ‘Lagaan’. The way we talk to each other..
– One more time.. Attention, everyone! Her Majesty
is arriving! Oh. Wow! Why have you brought
your maidservant along? Wow! You’re interviewing the team
of Panipat and you don’t even know
that the queen walks along with her maidservants. I didn’t ask you,
I was asking her. By the way, Kapil, everyone
can see that I am the queen. Excuse me. That’s because you’re working
in this show from starting. Otherwise, everyone knows
who deserves it. I can put you in prison
for your misbehaviour. Then where will you stay? You’ll put in prison. Idiot, how dare you laugh!
– Really? You can’t make anyone laugh
and you’re stopping me from laughing when someone
made me laugh. Listen, we’ll go
for hunting now. Go and arrange everything. Killing lice on the head
is not called hunting. People hunt using arrows
and she does it using nails. Holds it and.. Besides,
she has a microphone now. She increases the echo
to enjoy the sound. Why do you do all this, Bhuri? Your queen is being insulted.
What are you doing? I made a huge mistake
by appointing you both as my maidservants. We made a huge mistake
by choosing you as our queen. Hey, come on, we’re done.
Come, we’ll go. Go.. There are plenty
of maidservants out there. She intentionally brings the men
posing as women so that she can look beautiful. Kapil, I am showing manners.
What are you saying? The joker of circus
is showing manners. Even manners is important
along with education, Kapil. The escaped sheep
of Amir Khusrau. Why can’t you tell clearly?
What’s this? Our guests are here and you.. Actually, sir, I am playing
the role of the queen in the drama in our college,
so I am doing rehearsal. – Okay. First of all, collect donation
and get your principal treated who gives you these roles
every time. Do you know, Kriti is using
a sword bigger than you on the film? So what? Even I am running
such a big show. Kriti.
– Yes. Have you brought the sword
of your film with you? Kapil, let me talk
to the guests. Mr. Sanjay, I am a huge
fan of yours. I watched your ‘Sadak’.
– Yes. And then she walked ahead on the same road and started her office
near the signal. Bhuri, that’s enough. We’re
discussing something serious. You just go. Come on, dear.. We’re done.
– Come on, dear. Yes. You’ll get the same amount
even if you stretch it. Come on, run away! Neither the brave women
ever run away nor they ever escape
from the battlefield. Yes, since everyone runs away
by seeing your lips. Please forgive me.
They.. They ask me to say all this. It’s not intentional.
Bhuri, you know that I love you. But queen.. Kapil said it today. I think it has happened
for the first time. – Yes.. But..
– I love you? Jokes apart, tell me one thing.
How do you get the confidence to pose like a queen here?
– What do you mean? Even I come from a royal family. Do you know how many battles
my ancestors have fought? If you steal people’s utensils,
then they’ll fight for sure. Mr. Ashutosh, I am telling you
an incident. Please listen. You can use it in any film
if you make a comedy film. She went in a wedding.
The rice was prepared and she took out cardamom
and put it in her purse. She wanted to prepare tea
at home using that. Then the cook came. He took out
clove and gave her. She asked him what to do
with the clove. He punched her and asked her to keep it
along with the teeth so that it doesn’t pain. Hello. What! Oh, my God!
Then.. Has your dad got arrested again?
What happened? Kapil, the one who was playing
the role of king fell ill. It’s not that. He must have got
to know that you’re playing the role of queen. I have to find a new king.
– I don’t have time. Hey.. The king is here. Ms. Archana.
– Yes. Today, our colony is looking
like Panipat’s battlefield. Greetings, sir..
– Greetings.. Ms. Kriti, greetings.
Mr. Sanjay, greetings. First of all, I heartily want
to tell you all that I am a huge fan
of all three of you. Thank you. – Mr. Sanjay,
I am a die-hard fan of yours. Because when I watched
‘Vaastav’ for the first time even I started applying
vermilion on my forehead. And when I used to go
out of the house I used to wear salwar suit. It’s on the forehead..
– Yes. He would apply in the
parting. Women do that. Along with that
he would wear women’s dresses.. You know the Juhu road..
– Yes. He would stand there
all day. He comes here
and lies to us. Okay, fine.
I used to stand there. You first tell me
how you know everything. Tell me. – I used to go their
in my car. – Oh.. Anyways, Bhuri,
forget all the grudge and give me a hug. Look at your face. I won’t even give you stale
food, let alone giving hug. Firstly, I am unable to find
a king for my drama and besides, you’ve started
all this nonsense. Are you long-sighted? Look properly,
I am your king. Hey, don’t do it here.
Just get out. Go. Kapil, show some respect
to Bhuri’s future king. Mr. King.
– Yes. Please tell me which signal
your dynasty is in. The same signal where you
clean people’s vehicles and beg for money. Listen, Chandu, if the king
will be like you then I’ll elope with a soldier. By the way, Bhuri,
I am basically a soldier. I am not king, it’s just that
people call me king. Basically, I am a soldier. Then I’ll elope with a donkey. Are you happy now? Anyway, men are not men
anymore after marriage. Right, Kapil? Listen to me.
Man in soiled clothes. – What? Do not fight.
You want to be a king? Why not begin a try out? The director is here,
Mr. Sanjay is here. And if they like it
you may have a chance. Be that as it may,
I will go ahead. I have all the qualities. Just hold it. Just hold it?
Oh my God! Go on, take it. We can see all. Put it back on. Go on, King. – Is it
fine now? – Yes. Look at that gait. Hail to the King!
Hail to the King! This is how
the soldier acts. This is what
a soldier says. To the King. I am the King
and I do as I please. Leave it be, you cannot
do this. Now think over it. I am always thinking
about you. What is it? Abdali has attacked. I see. – What will you say
to your men to encourage them
for battle? I’ll tell them
not to panic and to stay calm
as Abdali is coming. You all can get
a selfie each. A king after all. We have some dignity.
– What? Was that not right? Considering your act.. We got a message. There are six cars
outside. Go and wipe them clean. Bhuri. We got some work
for today. Let us get right at it.
Come now. You ruin everything
for everyone. Not an issue.
We’ll do it. Thank you, sir.
Thank you, Ms. Kriti. Thank you.
– The car is outside, right? Fine, come. – What?
I am the queen! Come now. Sir, that is all. We do not go
into the details. We get things done
in time. We just come and..
– Had I done that I’ll finish the movie in ten days. Sir, tell me. Were there lines
in Urdu for Abdali? So often we fumble
speaking another dialect. You have been raised
in Mumbai So you have that accent. Did you not think that
you have landed in trouble? You have to tell them. I had thought well. Ashu did his research.
And all the lines. So I was troubled
with accents and details. So it was three
in the morning and I was shooting a scene where I speak of crossing
the river Ganga and then.. What was that?
– Cross Yamuna. We will cross Yamuna
and.. And cross on
the other side and face the enemy. It was so late
back then. And so I said
we’ll cross Ganga and cross to
the other side.. Being dead serious.
– Really? And everything
was done. And he was looking
at the monitor. And then he called out
to me. I asked what was it. And he said that
I spoke English. With full conviction. So what? You could have said that
Abdali spoke English. On his way. And there must be
so many funny incidents. And Kriti likes
using sword. And I saw a picture,
she cuts a cake with sword. Let me show you. It was in the promo.
At the wrap of the movie. Why was it a sword? Once you get a sword,
you cannot put it down. Indeed. You used that
to cut the cake? – Yes. Fed them by the word?
Another picture. Sir, we have another
picture of you. Here, he is sitting
wearing Abdali’s armour. I thought that you were
worried about an attack from an actor
with less lines. And hence this set up. Let me tell you.
It is interesting. Are you wearing that?
– Yes, I’ve not seen this. The temperature was
at 48 degrees. – Okay. A lot of men wearing
the chain mail. and it heats up quick
and it stings. And I had to take the shot. So I said I’ll wear it
and direct the shot. Amazing! So they feel that
they must wear it as I am wearing it too. Hi. How are you all?
– Great. Your movie will change
the course history. Yes. How are you, sir? I am fine.
– I am a great fan. Let me take a picture.
– What are you doing? Taking a picture.
– He poses. I got a message on social
media yesterday. – About? That if I share his picture
I will get good news. Good one. How are you, Kriti?
– I am fine. How about you? – Last time
you were here for ‘Housefull’? Yes. – You were opposite
Bobby Deol. Yes, for first half
then with Akshay. – Yes she was here
with Bobby first. And now she is with Baba. And next time she will be
here with a baby. How are you?
– Yes! Indeed. My next movie is based
on surrogacy. Promoting that?
Yes, I promoted. We have all details.
– We know it all. – Very smart. How are you, sir?
– Great. I am a great fan. I am telling you.
Go on. Whenever I face
any problem I think of you?
– What? Yes. I am worried
all day long. right from the dawn. Indeed.
I make quick work. He is the first man to act in such great
movies. None like before. He is here for the second
time now. Did you ask him
for any refreshments? How about a peg? What are you saying?
People know what he likes. Look at the time.
– About 10:00 p.m. Then he needs
something else. Sanjay, I want
you in Nala Sopara for a couple of days. Me? – Yes.
– Why? You must have seen Mandawa.
– Yes. – I’ll show you fools in Nala Sopara. For real.
– Oh, God.. Lechers flock that area.
They eve-tease me. If you come with me,
they will stop doing that. You were an amazing
as a villain. – Well.. You were a villain in ‘Musafir’,
‘Kaante’ ‘Agneepath’.. – Should he
give you Rs. 1 crore then? I don’t want money.
I have to get a building vacated in Nala Sopara. Will you go there with me? But seriously, you are handsome
even as a villain. You look so dashing that
the heroines pray to God to get them kidnapped by you and
send the hero away just once. Good. Sapna, what nonsense
are you talking? Why don’t you talk about his upcoming film?
– Film talk? – Yes. Sir, the promos look amazing.
You are a very good director. Thank you. – You know,
you are a very good director. You people have
done a great job. Mr. Sanjay, you are playing
Abdali in this film, right? If you say,
I can be Abdali, too. How can you be Abdali?
– You are Abdali? – Yes. How? – I bought Dal now.
Earlier, I’d get only Sabji. Now I have Dal.
– Dal! Oh, God! Sapna. You consume protein, right?
Dal is rich in protein. Yes, okay.
– So, have it. You know, Mr. Sanjay is going
to Karnal. Why are you laughing? You wrote these jokes backstage. He tells me to say all that. But then he laughs at me
for saying all that. You know what? – What?
– Mr. Sanjay is going to Karnal. How do you know that?
– His film ‘Zila Ghaziabad’ was released earlier.
– Yes. – Yes. Next was ‘Kurukshetra’.
– Yes. Now, it’s ‘Panipat’.
– ‘Panipat’. – Ahead of Panipat lies Karnal. Wow!
– Really! People travel via road,
while he, via films. He works that way.
And sir, how are you? I’m fine.
– You are a fantastic director. Thank you again. You hire so many artists
in your film. – Yes. Right? He has shielded
so many artists. Shielded? – Shielded?
– Shielded? – It’s not shielded but helped.
He has helped them. No, he makes war films.
So, the word ‘shield’ is apt. Well, sir, I had a question.
You direct such war films and supervise the use of spears,
daggers, etc. in the shooting. So, at home, do you dine
with cutlery or use spear and daggers instead? Sir, I have another question. Ask away. – Did you arrive here
in a car or on a horse? On an elephant.
– What are you blabbering! This is not nonsense.
It’s an intelligent question. But I’ll ask a silly question
now. Would you like to hear it? Yes. – Okay. – Sir, do you eat
rice and Dal or rice and dagger? This was nonsense. Very good! Sir, I have one more question.
– Yes, go ahead. Sir, when will this digging
in Mumbai for metro construction stop? What?
– How would he know that? He doesn’t know?
– Of course not! I thought he knew.
He directed ‘Mohenjo Daro’. Since he knew about Mohenjo Daro
excavation plan he might be knowing
about the metro plan too. Sir, you’re a nice director.
– There he goes again. Director..
Sir, I have one more question. In ‘Lagaan’, you hired
many English actors. And in ‘Swades’,
Mr. Shah Rukh Khan played an NRI.
– Yes. In ‘What’s Your Raashee?’,
Harman was also NRI. So what?
– Since you know many foreigners will you help my visa
get approved? He is not here to approve
your visa! Get lost! You always yell at me. I’m here to collect payment
for my massage service. What? – Massage?
– Massage service? – For what? You had horses
in your shooting, right? – Yes. When they would get tired,
they came here for massage at my parlour. I want my payment.
I provide services to everyone. To spear, dagger..
You know, a bow.. A bow. I massaged a bow
and straightened it out. Hey! But a bow is curved.
– It was, earlier. But I massaged it
and straightened it out. Now he is a huge star
in South India. Oh, Dhanush! Sapna, are you done? Now leave. No, I want to talk about work.
– What? This is my massage parlour.
– Okay. We have different types
of massage like Kancha Cheena Massage. Tell me about it. – In that,
we drag the customer with a rope and hang him up on the tree.
– Okay. – Okay. Then we remove the hairs
from his head, nose, eyelids and the entire body.
– So, doesn’t he complain? He does,
but we tell him beforehand.. ‘What did you bring along
into this world?’ ‘What will you take along
after death?’ We also have ‘Sanju Massage’.
– Okay. – Okay. Tell us about it. – In this,
we apply oil to the customer after removing his clothes. And when he is thirsty,
we give him two 60 ml drinks. And then?
– Then.. We massage him like this. Sir, this one is interesting.
You have done a great job in ‘Dushman’.
– Yes. So, we have Dushman Massage.
– Dushman Massage? – Yes. In this, we remove the
customer’s clothes and apply oil to him. Then from this side,
my friend enters. Her name is Suman. Another friend enters from
the other side. Her name is also Suman. So, two Sumans
massage him. ‘Dushman’. Two Suman!
– Two Suman! Oh, my! That was pathetic.
– Two Suman! Two Suman! – Why do you
pace up and down while laughing? Two Suman.
– Time to leave now. Mr. Ashutosh, the actor..
When he came here last time he left Rana here. And his Rana is
troubling us a lot. I have to handle that.
I’ll make a move. Mr. Sanju, your style.. Whatever you do
in the films.. People love you. But our audience think
that they can copy your walk. Can we call them if you allow?
– Sure. Who all can copy his walk?
Yes. He is one. Two..
I see. Even ma’am wants to copy.
Please come. Ma’am wants to copy.
– Yes. He is also there.
There are five people. Please. How are you? Introduce yourselves
one by one. I am amazed.
Even you copy his walk. Ma’am, what’s your name?
– Rupali. Rupali, where are you from? From Nagpur.
– Okay. Sir, where are you from? Sir, my name is Dilip.
I am from Surat. Okay.
You? Sir, my name is Lavi Bharti. Lavi!
– Lavi? – Yes. Lavi.
– Lavi dovey? Your name is very romantic. You have fixed
so many stickers in your pants. It’s looking nice.
– Right. Welcome to the show.
What’s your name? Sir, my name is
Ved Prakash Goswami. I am from Goda, Uttar Pradesh. Welcome to the show.
What’s your name. Hello.
My name is Mayur. And I am from
Gurgaon, Haryana. Okay.
Welcome to the show. Thank you.
Thank you, guys. Thank you so much.
Please come. Ms. Archana, do you
know something? This is a secret.
– What? Ashu sir imitates
Sanju sir very well. Really? Sir, we have learnt it
from many. That’s true. Ashu, let’s have it.
Come on. Sir.. While casting.. I wanted a someone
for Abdali who hasn’t done it before. And it will be fun
to watch Sanjay sir do this. It will add weight. I approached Sanjay. I asked him that he hasn’t done historical
till date. Why so? He said.. ‘Nobody asked me.’ I said, okay. I asked him if he will
do this historical for me. ‘I will do it.’
– So sweet. So, it’s as simple
as that. But the walk
that happened just now.. Tell me tell you that it’s a pleasure
to watch Sanjay.. Actually. Performing on the set. When he walks to set..
he leaves set.. He is rehearsing his lines.. You want to keep
looking at him. You are blessed, sir. Actually.
– I mean.. With his aura.. When I met him.. I..
His personality is so huge. You tend to look back
to check who has arrived. Actually. – And then,
when he talks, I felt.. Like, I was very amazed
and shocked that you are so humble. You are so.. I got comfortable with you
in no time. I wanted to be.. We are on the same poster.
Thankfully. But, I wanted to do
one scene with him. I requested Ashu sir
to give me one scene with him. He said, Parvati Bai
and Ahmed Shah Abdali never met. ‘How can I give you any
scene with him?’ They have never met.
– Then make them meet. He might be looking
through the binoculars and he could see me. This is not the fact.
I was present at the set. She is talking
about my aura. It’s not that. She was at a distance. I told her
to turn around. She turned back. When she looked back
so did I. Mr. Sajid Khan was saying this
in a show.. Mr. Sanju was present there. He was saying
that the parties in Bollywood.. A lot of stars would come
to the party but when he used to make
an entry then everybody would
turn around to see him. It’s the truth.
– I was saying the same. She is right.
There’s no doubt about it. We get to hear
rumours about the film stars. We don’t believe them.
We ask them directly. Sir, there’s a rumour
that you had asked for a good breed horses
and their per day charge was more than the actors. Which were these horses? I hope it wasn’t
this film. Sir, is this true
or a rumour? It’s the truth. This is amazing. The horses the actors
will get mounted on.. They need better horses. Yes. They were the most
expensive horses. Should we be horses
in next life? I think so. You already are one. Sir, we heard that you have
Ajay Devgn as family doctor. Right. How is that? He is a great knowledge
of medicines and of homeopathy. And he is like
a younger brother and I call him a doctor.
– Yes. I call him Doctor Ajay. He has a medicine. If we end up getting
drunk a lot. Then simply six drops
of that medicine gets everything
straight. Really?
– Homeopathy? Yes. Kriti, one for you. You spend hours
in washroom while trying to update
social media. Who says all that?
I want to know. Our guys. Not on set. Okay.
– But at home.. I too spend a lot of time
in there. I love spending time. On the pot. Best conversations
happen there. Sir, we have heard
that you go to forts to write new films. You find the souls
and speak to them. Is it true? Not at all. A rumour, then? It is. Kriti, we have heard you have
two last names. Sanon and Sanoff. What? Sun on..
– This is the case. What is that? Who wrote this joke? Forgive us.
That was a bad joke. It is fine. Sir, we have heard you took
your girlfriends to cemetery. Which ones? I would have taken
one or two. Not specific. For what? To make them see
my mom. Any grave did the job. Enter, the first one
to the left. Some are right as well.
Not all are fakes. Mr. Ashutosh. You have made a lot
of historic movies. If a skull is found in a dig,
then come to you asking for who it is. Is it true? I will not answer that. Kriti, another one. Your family reminds you
on a family group that you left the AC on. Yes. Very bad. This happens. Save energy.
– Yes.. Sir, your wife
is the producer. And we have heard since
the budget is high you have some
international producers. Yes. We have Rohit Shiladkar
and his company Vision world. And they are here. Rohit is here. We welcome you. I have never laughed
so much. Thank you, sir.
– You have a great show. Thank you, sir. You are very good, Kapil.
– Thank you. I had to tell you.
– Yes. Before you ask,
let me tell you. I never thought that
I’d be here. Sir, please do keep coming. Thank you so much. Stay happy and keep laughing. Ensure cleanliness. Keep watching
‘The Kapil Sharma Show.’ Good night. Take care.
Thank you.

100 thoughts on “The Kapil Sharma Show Season 2 – Ep 97 – Full Episode – 7th December, 2019

  1. কপিল শার্মার বাংলাদেশি ফ্যান কেউ দেখছেন নাকি?
    আমি সেই শুরু থেকে তার ভক্ত 😎

  2. ye to itna jaldi jaldi me itne cuts krke show upload kiya he yaha.
    ye sony walo ke ghr mattam tha jo sabko jana tha
    meeko ye bilkul pasand nai aya

    aaaaa thuuuu at set india

  3. বাংলাদেশী কপিল শর্মা ফ্যানেরা হাত তুলেন 😍😍

  4. Kapil Afghanistan loves you may you live a long and healthy life thanks for inviting Ahmad shah abdali the old king of Afghanistan.

  5. Pory episode m kse NY aik dafa bhi hero(arjun Kapoor) ka zikr tak ni kia. Yi sub salo bhai sy panga lyny ka result hy .Thokho talieeeeeeeeeeeeeee😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😩😢😩😩😩😩

  6. Bhut sabar kia lekin ek to bantha hain kapil u are madar chod jo kehna karna hain karo lekin humari baro ka mazaq mat uraw ok
    Sorry Indians bro ye show mujay behat pasand or dektha tha lekin ye kia bhook raha hain ye kutta

  7. Sidhu Moose Wale 💪🏻 nu bulao yr kde
    👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻
    👇🏻👇🏻
    👇🏻

  8. Brush your teeth 🦷 before you say something about The Great King 🤴 Ahmad Shah Abdali I was one of those who loved India But now I’m Starting Hate just Because You Insulted the father of Afghanistan 🇦🇫 How will you feel if we make jokes on Gandi

  9. This is not fair with a nation who claims civility to humiliate others Heros, Everything is noted in history. I object the whole movie fake controversial story and process. I solute the great Empire Ahmad Shah Abdali

  10. So sad to see Kapil is making a mockery of Abdali, who is a great personality of our history. I have been a fan of Kapil but it seems like he doesn't abide by the primary mediatic codes. Indeed Ahmad Shah was literate, he was a philosopher and poet whose poems are still being taught in Afghani schools. Ashutosh a stubborn Marathi racist has completely misportrayed Ahmad Shah Abdali and other Indian tribes. This movie will definitely harm the Afghan-Indian relation which has been a congenial relationship since the last few decades. Let not the racist people of our nations with their venomous thoughts poison our friendship.

  11. all the songs and music portion of the show are totally cut off regarding the copyright issue due to which youtube viewers don't get to watch some important entertaining segment…….rather can fill up witn some alternative music on that segment as they did in their previous videos.

  12. It's good that Ashutosh made some of the great movies in Bollywood.. but the best thg he did was he fought with Sajid Khan and his sister on one of the award for making rideculous jokes…… ✌️✌️✌️

  13. Same things were done by Director K. Asif in Mughal e azam, he used real pearls (Moti) to give authenticity to the scene and walked bare foot in hot sand along with Prithivi raj Kapoor. Maybe Ashutosh might have got inspired and have repeated many more things in the movie…

  14. Hait mc bc, kavi shaadi he mat karo tension saaf. Ye mc kapil v hamesha pati patni k bare mai negative he bolta rehta hai

  15. I'm from CanadA, AB
    # PeopLe z are nicer here,
    About Punjabi Z seniors are
    so honest, &# polite BesT 1
    And we're the WORLD
    We all have BesT 😊 LifE # NamAstE

  16. Sanju Baba Aate Hai Toh Episode Kaise Nikal Jata Hai Pata Hi Nahi Chalta. The Most Honest Man Of the Industry. #LoveYouBaba
    Agli Baar Do Episodes Ke Liye Rakhna Unko. TRP 4-5 Times Zyada Ayengi. Record Bhi Ho Sakta Hai India Ka.

  17. Ahmad sha abdli kon hy?madar jat o King te Afghanistan ka Sanjedat tery ma ke soht kapil ma dar jat You have insulted the President of Afghanistan.

  18. When I came to eat from your mouth, then also for Abdali that come, that people attack us. A stranger comes to Abdali to save you. Now you have directed him. In this film dogs bastards.😡😡😡😡😡😡

  19. Industry main do baba hai Sanju Baba and Ranveer Baba donoka acting boletoh ekdummmmmm faaaadooo😎✌🏻
    #BabasAreBest!!!

  20. Dekha nahi par suna h Bollywood ki aur Filmo ki tarha is me bhi jhut bahot h

    Love from Afghanistan
    but itna zyada jhut sehat kilye acha nhi h

  21. arjun kapoor ko kyun nahi bulaya salman khan ne bola hoga m……c ko bulana mat mere show mai 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  22. When you fucked up with Salman khan..you can't even promote your own cinema. Salman bhai the ultimate boss..

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