Strong Enough to Be Wrong | Joshua Harris | TEDxHarrisburg

Strong Enough to Be Wrong | Joshua Harris | TEDxHarrisburg

Translator: Daniel Moore
Reviewer: Leonardo Silva I have a question for you. Is admitting you’re wrong a sign of weakness or a sign of strength? And how hard is it for you to consider
that you’ve gotten something wrong? I’m not talking about small areas. What about when the stakes are high? When what you’ve gotten wrong
could affect your livelihood, or your involvement in a community, or even your own sense of identity? I wish that these questions
were just theoretical, but for me, they’re very real, very right-now questions
that I am wrestling with in a very public way. So let me tell you
a little bit of my journey. I could take you to the exact spot,
in my parents living room, in Gresham, Oregon, where I knelt down
and I prayed this prayer, “God, let me write a book
that will change the world.” Be careful what you pray for! (Chuckles) I was 20 years old, I was young, I was religiously zealous, I was certain and I was restlessly ambitious. Youth, zeal, certainty, ambition – Not unlike the ingredients
of the Molotov cocktail, they have the tendency
to set the world on fire. And, in my little corner of the world,
that’s exactly what happened, because, incredibly,
my prayer was answered. I did write a book,
it was published and it exploded! It started to sell and sell and sell. The publisher kept writing me, saying:
“We’re going back to print.” It was selling tens of thousands
of copies every month. I remember the day that I went
into my local Christian book store, and there was my book, the number one,
bestselling book in the country. And it stayed there for months. I was on national radio shows, newspaper articles were being
written about me and my book. The pinnacle of my 15 min of fame was when I was on
the Bill Maher television show, sitting across from a young actor
named Ben Affleck. I had a conversation with Batman. (Laughter) My book went on to sell
over 1,2 million copies and was translated
into dozens of languages. Now, if you were not a part
of the Evangelical Christian subculture in the late 1990s, you will not have heard
anything about my book. But, if you were growing up
in that environment, there is a sense in which my book
did change your world. Now, some people would say,
“For the better,” but there are a lot of people
who would say, “For the worst.” And there are some that are
still really pissed off about that. My book was called:
“I Kissed Dating Goodbye – A new attitude towards
relationships and romance.” I was writing to fellow Christians. I saying: “We need to be
serious about our faith, and if we’re serious about our faith,
we won’t have sex until we’re married, and if we want to avoid premarital sex, then we should radically
change our lifestyle, and that means we should stop dating. Dating is the problem. Dating is a distraction,
it’s preparation for divorce, it leads to temptation.” (Laughter) I was 21. I knew a lot, okay? (Laughter) I should probably mention at this point
that I’d been homeschooled my whole life and I’d only been in one
serious relationship at this point. (Laughter) Now, you know, there were
some things about this book that I still think are good. Some people were helped by the reminder that you don’t have to be in a dating
relationship to be a complete person. Some people were helped to realize
they could take a break from dating and focus on personal development. And I still think that there’s a lot
that takes place in modern dating that can be really selfish and harmful, and some of that needs to be challenged. But my eyes have really been open
in the last few years, to see some fundamental problems
in the book that I wrote. You know, I didn’t leave room for the idea
that dating could be a healthy way of learning what you’re looking for
in a long-term relationship, that it could be a part
of growing personally. I made that the focus, I gave the impression that there was
really one formula that you coild follow, and if you followed that,
then you would be happily married, God would bless you and you’d have a great
sex life and marriage. Obviously, the real world
doesn’t work that way. But probably the thing
that I regret the most is that there was
a lot of fear inside of me that I transferred into my writing, and fear is never a good motive: fear of messing up, fear of getting your heart broken, fear of hurting somebody else, fear of sex. (Sigh) Yeah. Why did it take me so long
to see these problems? You know, I think it was because
I was so afraid of being wrong! You know, that book had made me
a best-selling author, it had given me an identity, it had make me slightly famous, and it was so easy to just write
the critics off as haters, you know, “Those are the haters,” and then find people who liked my book
and hide behind them. And isn’t that the great thing
about the Internet? No matter who you are or what you think, you could find someone
on the Internet that agrees with you. You could literally be Hitler and find people who think
you’re doing a good job. But it was so hard for me
to face up to being wrong because it felt like I would be saying
that a big part of my life was wrong, and I didn’t have courage to do that. What helped me to begin
to let my guard down was, a few years ago, I stopped being the pastor of a large
church and I went back to school. I went to graduate school and I stopped having to be
constantly right about everything and defend all these different ideas, and I just became a student
who was listening. And I developed relationships
with my fellow students, and a lot of them started to share stories
with me about the effect my book had had. And many times
this was a negative effect, and I couldn’t just write them off
as angry trolls on the Internet. These were my friends, and so I listened. And then one day, on Twitter,
of all places, this woman wrote me, and she said, “Your book
was used against me like a weapon.” And I almost didn’t answer her because I was afraid
she would lash out at me, but in this particular day, I just answered and said, “I’m so sorry,” such a simple human interaction. And that interaction
led to a conversation, and that conversation led to a friendship, and that friendship changed me. She said something to me
that I’ll never forget. She told me that
that back and forth on Twitter was the first time that a religious leader had ever acknowledged
getting something wrong, and ever apologized to her. And I heard that and I just thought, “There’s something
really unhealthy about this.” That led me to open up my website
and invite people to share their stories, the effect my book had had, and we just published them
uncensored on the website. Some of those were stories of people
having a positive experience, but others were heart-wrenching. Others were from people
who were really angry and hurt. And now I’m in this process of working
with a fellow student at my grad school who was a woman who was hurt
by my book, growing up, and we’re producing a documentary that’s sharing the journey
of me going back and looking at the book, but also trying to tell a bigger story about how religious communities
talk about sexuality, and talk about relationships and what it looks like
to face up to moments when we don’t get everything right,
even when we’re well-intentioned. We crowdfunded this
and we’re giving the film away online, and hoping it will be helpful to someone. It’s been such an emotional
roller coaster for me, though. You know, there are moments
where I feel contrite, and then other moments
where I swing over and I’m defensive and I’m mad that people
are blaming me for things, and a lot of times I just want
to run away from the whole process. But the reason I don’t is because I believe that this is
the pathway of growth for me, that I’m going to learn things
in facing up to what I got wrong that I won’t be able
to learn any other way. I’m discovering that there is
transformational power in admitting that you got something wrong. A couple of things
that I’m learning in the process. First, I’m learning that evolution
always involves death. You know, we talk about
how we want to evolve personally. That sounds great, right? It sounds sophisticated. I mean, who doesn’t want to become a smarter, stronger, more loving,
compassionate version of themselves? We all want to evolve personally,
but think about what evolution requires, when you think about the evolution
of the species over generations. There’s a lot of death that takes place! Natural selection is a traumatic thing. We talk about the survival of the fittest, but think about all those that were not
the fittest, that did not survive? There is death involved. And why should we think that
personal evolution would be any different? It’s never this painless, clean process. There is a type of death involved. It involves dying to old ways of thinking, it involves dying to old habits, maybe even to old relationships
that are keeping us from growing. Evolving personally involves admitting
that you got some things wrong, and letting those things die. The second thing that I’m learning is that you can’t rush
this process of transformation. You can’t just rush through it. I think most of us, when we
realize we got something wrong, we just want to get through that
as quick as possible and get back to feeling right. And the way that a lot of us do that
as individuals, or even as organizations, is we just change our behavior, and we don’t actually acknowledge that
we changed or that we got anything wrong and we want everyone
to just kind of pay no attention to the man behind
the curtain, or the past. In some cases, when we
have to say something about it, we just give these lame apologies. You know the classic line, “If anyone was offended,
I’m sorry to anyone who was offended, In other words, it’s your fault
for being offended. I’m sorry you’re offended, right? We just want to get past it, don’t really want to deal with all
the tension and the messiness of it. We just want to get back to being right. But if you try to rush through that,
you’re not going to grow. I’ve been dragging out the process,
even doing this documentary, where I’m sitting down across from people
who have been hurt by my book, and it sucks! It really does! And yet, it’s in that tension of asking these questions
and facing up to this that I’m really growing. And it involves asking questions like, “What shaped my thinking?” “What was behind that? How did that express itself? How did that affect other people? And what do I need to learn so that I don’t repeat
those same mistakes?” Those are hard questions to ask,
that don’t come instantly, It requires time. Think about a caterpillar. The caterpillar doesn’t just one day,
instantaneously, sprout wings and become a butterfly. No, a caterpillar literally has
to dissolve before it can transform. It forms a cocoon and, within that cocoon,
it becomes a caterpillar smoothie – it’s not the most scientific explanation – before it can be transformed. When you are admitting
that you got something wrong, there are going to be moments
where you’ll feel like you’re dissolving. You know, you’ll feel like you’re loosing
your swagger, your confidence – You may be losing relationships – You may even be lose your sense of self, if you’re used to base
a lot of your identity in those ideas, or that practice, or whatever it might be. But something new it’s being born, so don’t rush through it,
don’t try to skip it. The final thing that I’m learning is that admitting that you’re wrong
will tick some people off. I wish I could say that you’ll just get
a bunch of people coming alongside you, patting you on the back and saying,
“It’s so humble of you to process this.” But – expect resistance. And it makes sense, doesn’t it? Because there are people in your life
who were invested in the old you. There are people in your life
who want you to stay the same, maybe because they just love you,
love you the way that you are, but also possibly because,
if you admit you’re wrong, and they agree with you, then by implication they are wrong
and don’t want to deal with that, so they’d rather you stay the way you are
than have to face up to that themselves. So, I mean, if you’re in one career,
and you decide to switch careers, all the people who helped you
get there and invested in you, they are going to take that personally. Or if you’re part of an organization, and you begin to question whether
you’re wrong about ideals and values that are at the core of that organization, that’s going to feel like an attack
to that organization. They aren’t going to like that. It’s an interesting thought exercise
just the process, you know. If I were to change my mind and admit that I was wrong
about X, Y, Z – fill in the blank – where would I get pushback? It could come from family,
come from a religious community, come from the business
that you’re a part of. You know, the hardest part for me,
of re-evaluating my book, has been interacting with people
who love my book! Because they’re so confused,
and they’re so supportive, and I’m so grateful for them! And yet, as I’m questioning my own book, which I feel like I should be
allowed to do, because it’s my book – (Laughter) I can tell that they’re like,
“You’re not allowed to do that!” Because they made decisions based
on the ideas in my book and they feel like
I’m criticizing their life, which I’m not! I’m not at all doing that. And I’ve really sought to honor them,
and respect them, and hear their stories, but at the end of the day I know that I can’t be controlled
by someone else’s viewpoint. I think the big idea that I really want
to leave with you is this: I think that a lot of us
have been wrong about being wrong. We’ve been so scared of it, we’ve been so afraid of it. We’ve viewed it as weakness. We’ve viewed it as something
that is shameful, and so we’ve shunned people
who’ve gotten things wrong. You know, “Just fired them,
push them aside and find right people!” And it’s the right people who are
never wrong that we want to follow. We want to have leaders. But think about it, people who are always right, they are not really growing! They can’t change! If they’re always right
and they change, they’ll be wrong, You follow me? Now, I think we need
to change our thinking and to realize that admitting
that you’re wrong really takes a form of strength. And so instead of viewing it
as a dead end, we should view it as a new start, and instead of shunning people
who admit they got something wrong, we should encourage them and invite them to come and share
the wisdom that they’re learning. You know, the great news – The great news about learning
to admit that you got something wrong is that you don’t have to be
so afraid of being wrong, which means you can move toward people
that see the world differently than you and not be so terrified
that they might change your mind. It means that you can dream, and dare, and risk, and live. Thank you so much. (Applause)

100 thoughts on “Strong Enough to Be Wrong | Joshua Harris | TEDxHarrisburg

  1. Logic is imposed on us by the mind of God.

    Laws of Logic exists to control our thoughts and are intended to lead us to the Truth.

    Not much different than the laws of nature and ethical laws.

  2. false prophet, do not speak lies better to tie a stone around your neck and throw yourself in the sea

  3. Por esta razón las decisiones de la vida no deben basarse en lo que dice un libro sino en lo que dicen las escrituras.

    La palabra de Dios permanece por encima de nuestros conceptos.

  4. Joshua Harris was never a believer in Jesus Christ. He fulfills Matthew 13:20-21 and 1 John 2:19. There are many in the church that can have an intellectual knowledge of God's Word and even the workings in the church, but absolutely have no relationship with God because they hate God's Word and is trying to live out a life that they actually hate. They're phonies. The things about false converts are that they are still unsaved, which means they can only have so much self-control before they reveal their actual hatred for God's Word, God's ways, and even God's person. This is the reason 2 Peter 2:22 describes the false teacher as a dog that returned to his own vomit because a dog is always going to be a dog and sooner or later will do something that indicates he is a dog. A false teacher will return to his unsaved way of thinking because an unsaved person is just that and will do (and say) things showing he is unsaved.

    This "apology" that Joshua Harris gave is just one of many signs that he wasn't a true believer. His divorce is another because apparently Ephesians 5:25-33 is meaningless to him. The bottom line, you will hear professed "Christians" talking about how they didn't like the church, God's commands, the way sinners were treated, etc. as an excuse to reveal who they were from the beginning, just an actor playing the Christian game. Once you expose that you hate the things of God, you expose you actually hate all of God. In fact, Joshua Harris has actually made a liar of Jesus Christ because Christ said His sheep hear His voice and follow Him, and nothing can pluck the believer out of His hand or God the Father's hand in John 10:27-29. Yet Joshua has plucked himself out of God's hand? So either Joshua is a liar or Jesus Christ is the liar. Absolutely it is Joshua, so we know he never truly believed.

  5. Sounds like Joshua Harris has let the opinions and criticisms of others sway his core beliefs. How do you become hurt from a book? If you don't agree with the beliefs espoused in print, then formulate your own beliefs and opinions and get over being a victim.

  6. His up himself and he is falling like Lucifer big time. Humble your self buddy your not that good. You need to be silent for a while to really get your message across. If you keep talking confusion keeps coming out your mouth, recovery comes from silence because humility dosen't justify. Your using your down fall now to get money promoting your wrong to gain wealth…your a faker big time and empath people can see right through you… just get off the stage buddy…go home and get right with your wife and family then I will listen to you…

  7. Sounds like he's falling back into his old ways. He's gotta be right. So he's right again about being wrong. And I guess he's right again about divorcing his faithful wife. This guy ain't worth listening to. He's confused, and he's gonna confuse others who are listening to his gibberish.

    He set up his listeners by beginning with the statement, "is it a sign of weakness to admit you were wrong?" People let down their guard when they hear a statement like that. Of course he answers his own question. But it's a no-brainer. The average person hates pride and loves humility. He's become the source of wisdom, rather than turning people to the Wisdom which comes from above to be their Source.

  8. You renounce God, He's still God. You leave Him, you only rob yourself of His fullness and goodness. And it's not about money. The peace, the forgiveness, the presence of the Spirit of God in us, the transformation, the love, the hope, the guidance, the plans God has for us and then heaven are things money, friends and family can't give us… I don't think anyone should live this life without Christ Jesus.. John 3:36

  9. He was wrong before, but not because of his views on relationships. Because he was a Calvinist. He never understood the character of God and the reality of free will.

  10. He was never a believer in Christ. Only an actor, self-deceived. The Bible warns of such. I do not rejoice in this. May God have mercy on him, that he repents and comes to know Christ. Make sure you're not self deceived. Blessings!

  11. Hi friends. There is an enormous difference between "believing in Jesus" and "placing your faith in Jesus". You can believe in the tooth fairy or the easter bunny or Jesus for that matter, but that's meaningless. For example, I can say that I know George Bush. I've read a book by him and seen hours upon hours of videos and tv over the years so, I can say that I know Him or believe in him. But…He doesn't know me. Do you see my point friend? I can say truthfully that I know George Bush but George Bush doesn't know me. You see? So you can say you know Jesus all day long but if He doesnt know you, then youre still lost friend. If you're on an Airplane and it's going to crash, you can't just "believe" in a parachute. You have to actually put that parachute on my friends. This is called "faith". Faith in Jesus means you place your faith in Jesus just like you did that parachute before you had to jump out of that airplane – and that results in a relationship with Him. The New Testament says that demons identified Jesus as Messiah before He made it public. So the demons "believe in Jesus" and they do not have eternal life abiding in them neither can they participate in Salvation. Romans 5:1 says, "Therefore being justified by faith we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ". We are Justified by faith NOT BELIEF my friends. Simply "believing in Jesus" Is called false conversion. People that get trapped or "lose their faith" have not applied themselves in God's Word. They spent all their time in books about the Bible but not the Bible itself. Most "Christians" are this way. They've been in church for years or even have worked for one but they do not know their Bibles. They know the latest author or some dudes book. But they have not, according to Paul, "let the Word of Christ dwell in them richly" (Colossans3:15). These were they that spent almost no time in serious prayer and they for sure did not labor in the Word like Paul and Peter did. Unfortunately churches are full of people like this that just went through the motions never having a relationship with Jesus personally. Please, please, please think about this my friend. Where you spend eternity depends on it.

  12. Straight (?) white male finds so revelatory the act of admitting he was wrong that he does a Ted Talk about it. It could be an Onion headline.

  13. Reading all these negative comments by these Christians really hurts my heart…. The religion of love indeed….

  14. I'm proud of you for admitting it. Having grown up in it that subculture is very hard on young men. We're all supposed to grow up to be world changers rather than being all right with being a good person who has a good impact on those around them and anything less than the world changer scenario is somehow not measuring up. I was like you too. 21 and knew everything. Better late than never to admit we had a lot of growing up to do.

  15. Followers of Christ should base everything on Gods word,even 'Christian books' should not be taken as absolutes and a standard. Feed your spirit with word of God it will guard your soul form the enemies deception.

  16. He was wrong, but now he is right? How does he know he is right now? …. Now he thinks he is more right leaving his wife and destroying the family unit with 3 children? I am not sure how a man can act so childishly giddy telling millions he has done wrong…where is the remorse? He is selfish and self absorbed.

  17. For a former Pastor, I did not hear any scripture that helped him through his struggle……but he did talk about how evolution helped.

  18. He uses humanistic terms…indicative of where he came to. The humility is good, but he is clearly not grounded in the Lord, as evidenced by his recent denial of Christianity.

  19. I met this guy in the mid to late nineties at an acsi conference with his fiancé! I was fearful Josh was going to evolve, and some day renounce the Lord! Very sad! Ever searching and never finding the Truth! He’s 18” from getting it right! It was in his head, but Christ is not in his heart!

  20. His book is full of formulas that American evangelicals love—steps, principles, keys, secrets—things to do to achieve the goal. His talk here was just another formula. He’s just switched teams.

  21. I remember hearing about this guy and the book he wrote 📙 in the 90's. I didnt purchase but listened to the interviews including one in, Focus On The Family. I did take a prolonged brake from dating and focused on getting an education It was a good decision for me. .

  22. I was so impressed by his dad, Gregg at a homeschool seminar. He said that Noah was a good dad because he was able to get his sons into the boat…I feel so bad for Gregg because I bet he is just grieving that his son got out of the boat. He is grieving because his son is perishing. He is a prodigal and I pray that someday he will return to truth.

  23. He is trying to appear enlightened instead of just saying that he turned his back on the cross. Fame in the church is a problem. Celebrity preachers are a problem.

  24. Maybe you should stay out the spot light for a while if you are still in the self discovery stage…. Just to show your not trying to reclaim your 15 minutes of Fame again.

  25. We cannot please everyone. If people were hurt/offended it is not your fault. Staying pure before you get married is still your own choice. We just need to please God and not men. If you keep on thinking about pleasing all, you will end up like J.H.

    If you're thinking to save the people who got wronged by the book then you could have just REVISED IT!


  27. Protestant theology is no foundation. Perhaps that’s why they always succumb to modern views. Protestants feel responsible to determine dogma. I noticed how he said he feels he had to be right. If you believe its Truth and the word of God, why do you have to be right or wrong, it’s not your truth, it’s God’s Truth.

  28. JESUS is human and JESUS never lies. I pray for Joshua Harries that he finds that WILD and HONEST JESUS WHO IS FULL OF LIFE. 🙏 🌈

  29. The thing is Josh, you were ALWAYS wrong, and you’re STILL wrong. Stop talking about yourself in front of ppl. Go away and die quietly.

  30. who says that you are now right???????? in another 10 years we will hear you denounce this view!!!!!!!

  31. Josh – your book harmed no one. It may have helped many. But you denouncing you faith in Christ is harming untold number of people – especially young Christians. Have you no shame, Josh? Have you no fear of God? Oh, that's right……you don't believe in God anymore – or do you? Make yourself clear, Josh. There are writers out here such as myself, who are trying very hard to explain what happened to you. I would NOT want to be you as you stand before judgment. You can still get it right. Repent and return to your First Love!

  32. He sold 1.2 million books.
    Lot of money he got!
    Now he realizes he made money off things he was wrong on and hurt people! How about u donate some if that money to groups you helped?

  33. 1 John 2:19 King James Version (KJV)

    19 They went out from us, but they were not of us; for if they had been of us, they would no doubt have continued with us: but they went out, that they might be made manifest that they were not all of us.

  34. Yes. 🙏🏻❤️ well done 🙏🏻🕊Humility. Repentance. The path through forgiveness into re-Creation. The highway of righteousness. You are getting it. This is redemption. Jesus is so much more than just Savior. He is the Redeemer.

  35. You admit that many were helped so why the overtures only to the 'offended'? (what about people who are offended/hurt by your current position? Is that the subject of another book deal?) Truth, by nature, is well received by some and not by others.

  36. Maybe he's just wrong now just like he was WRONG when he wrote his best selling book. He's just doing the same thing now like he was then. He's having a midlife crisis. But Jesus Christ is the person that can help him through it. Even though he turned his back on Jesus, Jesus hasn't turned his back on Josh. Jesus can help josh see and know who is truly, truly right. Jesus can give him peace, the peace he is searching for. Theres nothing wrong with being right. Jesus didn't, doesn't apologize for being right. He is God. He is our Creator. God knows where Josh is coming from. God is a compassionate God.

  37. I thought this talk was really coo. Harris admitted he was wrong. How few people do that?!
    I know people who have done way worse and said way more damaging things than Harris who still haven't apologized and even went to their grave never apologizing.

  38. I am praying for you Josh. You are so intelligent, talented and charismatic. Be careful. He who is using you will dump you when you are no longer useful. Case in point, Judas.

  39. Strong enough never to be a Christian
    and pose as a minister of satan 🤔🤥
    2 Corinthians 11:14-15
    But Gods Grace is still offered to Joshua and losts souls and still all can receieve the Forgiveness of SINS by placing there Faith and Trust in Christs one time sacrificial blood payment for sin on Calvarys Cross The death burial and resurrection of The Risen Lord Jesus Christ The Gospel that (SAVES TODAY)
    1 Corinthians 15:1-4
    In whom we have redemption through his blood the forgiveness if sins according to the riches of his grace Ephesians 1:7
    Ephesians 2:8-9 Titus 3:5
    Never renounce a Faith you never Believed and Trusted for Eternal Salvation and confuse it for following the god of this world 2 Corinthians 4:4
    But I fear least by any means as the serpent beguiled Eve through his subtilty so your minds should be corrupted from the simplicity that is in Christ 2 Corinthians 11:3

  40. Man, I just read through some of the comments below and there is a whole lot of judgment going on. It's amazing the tight little circles of what is right and what is true that people draw.

  41. Hey Josh what were you wrong about? All the “dating” stuff aside, did you kiss your savior Jesus Christ goodbye? I’m glad He hasn’t done that to you and I. You need the pure and simple gospel spoken to you.

  42. Then he was never saved. When you are saved, you ‘know’ Jesus, you can’t ‘unknot’ Him. Just another false convert. Hopefully, he’s just deceived and not a wolf.

  43. What if you're wrong about being wrong? I guess that's part of your journey and it will be something you have to figure out. I love you and I'm praying for you and Shannon always, but I believe you're more wrong now than you've ever been in your life, and headed down the path of being one of the casualties of faith that Jesus refers to in Luke 18:8 when the question is asked "Will there be faith left on the earth when He comes?" My question is…have people now educated themselves into imbecility so that they believe the Liar's lies and are dammed in the name of being cool, accepted and intelligent?" I can understand falling into sin, Josh being allured into a life style you once believed to be immoral…because sadly, I've done so myself, but renouncing the Savior who shed His blood to save you??? from eternal punishment is quite another thing unless you don't believe that anymore either??? In that case…you'll have to wait and see if you're right or wrong and it's a risky bet. As you go down this path, the 3 x 5 cards are stacking up in the file cabinet and you know what I mean. There's still grace Josh…you've heard far more eloquent appeals than my humble words…and I doubt you'll hear me because I believe you're being lured in by the sirens of a culture on the broad road to destruction. Sadly, you'd be the last person on earth I would have thought would have followed their call…but then none of us are exempt from the principalities and spiritual rulers in high places (1 Cor 10:12). He is trying to devour you, render you ineffective and then laugh at your destruction in the end. Jeremiah 6:16 is the answer and you know it. Josh shake yourself and stop beating yourself up over following in C.J.'s shadow…you did nothing wrong. I believe that letting the hurt and pain he and others in the local church brought you has birthed this and I wish you'd run to someone else like Ravi or Larry T…or someone you trust. Please don't throw the Savior away trying to process this. He is everything and without Him we're on a dangerous path. In my journey away from the Lord…He punished me severely before I would wake up and turn back to Him….don't make Him get out the rod…because as He did to David…He will do to you too because you are His son and He loves you and will do what it takes just as you would do to your son to keep him from destroying himself! Hebrews 6:4 and Matthew 10:33 ate away at my heart during my back slidden condition and brought "healthy" and much needed conviction. Don't throw out the baby with the bath water! Don't take out your hurt with the church and the Mahaneys out on Jesus…He loves you and so do I and countless thousands of others! I wouldn't have written this publically but I don't know how to reach you!

  44. I read this book years ago! found it intrige, never really took his advice myself, I found it nahive also! I was 26 when I read it, and dated a lot already! have to kiss many frogs to find my right one! I could have never follow his advices anyway! I am very happy nowdays! made many mistakes? yes, and happy to learn from each!

  45. Feels like a desperate attempt to stay relevant, like a promo for something he's doing or writing. His mannerisms seem disingenuous. Grasping at straws to get your attention, even if it means throwing himself and his reputation under the bus to get it. Bold move if it works…

  46. The Bible says that in the last days many will fall away. I can only feel sorry for the sky. What a tragedy for him to be making money on denying her Christ. His future is bleak. I pray he repents.

  47. I read his book in 2000. I thought it was excellent and biblical sound. I am just hearing about all this change! Is walking away from the Lord that easy after knowing Him and being in relationship with Him. The world offers nothing!!! I don't get it!!!

  48. As a believer in Jesus Christ, I personally have felt God move me in directions that are incredibly scary to voice unto the world. I feel that we as a collective human whole, have become judgemental and therefore divided. Now, I may be wrong, but I believe God may have intentionally placed us under these "circumstances" as a test of our compassion for our fellow humans. I say humans as opposed to all life simply bc it is square one to our understanding of compassion, unity and universal love which he is the source of in this beautiful universe. I personlly am grateful for this mans willingness to voice his heart. We do not have to follow his every word, but maybe the point here is to simply consider that progress is the point. Difference in Perception is a funny reality that I think could unite us all, or tear us apart. Maybe it just depends on how we choose to see it. Then what we choose to do from there. – Just another human, going through process of progress. Bless all that may stumble.🙏💝👣

  49. He has “evolved” into a textbook Narcissist. What a brave martyr… how “brave” of him to come out against Christians, who are literally (& brutally) martyred around the world for believing in Jesus; a God who is bigger than themselves. He’s leaping from a “faith” (that he never truly had!!) into the welcoming ultra-liberal, vehemently anti-Christian, “progressive” mosh pit that is ANTI-God society today!
    He depicts himself as a courageous man. I wonder how confident he will be on judgment day when he actually stands before the Christ he now denies. Yikes.

  50. Josh you do not have to try to get everyone onboard to justify your unbelief , Calvinism is dangerous and it causes great harm , praying for you, The Gospel is a free gift by the grace of God, John chapter 3, 1 Cor 15:3-5, Ephesians 2:8-9, Titus 3:5, 1 John 5:13

  51. I find it interesting that towards the end he said “I can’t be controlled by someone else’s view point”. But that is exactly why he started questioning his own views in the beginning of the talk, other peoples view point.

  52. No wonder the Scriptures stated that a leader in the Church should not be a novice and states "Lay hands on no man suddenly". This is just proof of this. Satanic pride got to this man and he fell.

  53. Why can't anyone upon deciding they are wrong, take a breath, a step back, think and be quiet for a few … years. Learn and grow. But here is Josh, like 2 seconds after now deciding he is wrong "preaching" his NEW message to 100s of thousands of people. Ridiculous. How do you know you're not wrong this time Josh?

  54. I remember when Harris's book came out, and admitting that there is something obviously higher and purer about courtship towards marriage, than shallow hooking up for the pleasure of fairer company, ETC: with broken hearts, (or worse), on both sides, left lying in their wake. I didn't clearly hear; in Josh's talk, here, how any of that is wrong with him now.

    So,… I'm still going to continue to support courtship over hooking up, and I don't care wtf (that's: where's their faith) folks think otherwise!

  55. So what exactly was wrong with what he wrote and once believed? Though not infallible, I've found his books to be full of wisdom and sound advice.

  56. His anti-dating message was a good excuse for an awkward teenage kid like me to avoid talking to girls. I missed out on the chance to learn as a young dude how to meet them and get dates. At some point God doesn't bring you a wife, and you realize you really do have to figure it out for yourself.

  57. I wonder if he ever thought of going to a Christian counselor, Scripture or an accountability buddy…. nope he just abandoned ship and kept all the money he made Christians

  58. Judas iscariot: kiss Jesus goodbye!……. Joshua Harris: kiss dating goodbye! Jesus: some of you will deny the faith.

  59. So I'm mostly through the speech and he hasn't yet said a single thing… does he? Just fluffm one big commercial for his documentary.

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