Overly Sarcastic Podcast: The Ptolemies

100 thoughts on “Overly Sarcastic Podcast: The Ptolemies

  1. I can't really judge the Ptolemies for all the incest anymore. I was playing ptolemaic egypt in imperator rome and I almost accidentally married my heir to his little sister. It happens so easily if you're not paying attention….

  2. This is probably one of the funniest videos I've ever seen, but I wish I'd heard how we got from Ptolomy X and Cleopatra V to Cleopatra VII or VIII (don't remember which one SHE was) – though I value your sanity enough to not press the issue

  3. LOL i thought he was going to tell me about some unheard of 'rape of Nanjing" kinda of true history terror from the way he was shaking. but instead i get

    Blue: "Did you know sometimes royal families did an incest"
    Me: Pikachu surprise face

    But seriously, with every video i see more and more evidence that these two have lived incredibly sheltered lives.

  4. One thing that the Ptolemies do illustrate is that inbreeding does not necessarily mean Habsburg-esque deformities. Ultimately, inbreeding is a risk, one that increases that likelihood of harmful recessive alleles causing problems, but even extreme inbreeding doesn't make severe medical conditions inevitable. The fact that people make the automatic link of inbreeding = horrific deformity mostly reflects taboos we have about incest, not hard and proven medical fact. It's gross, so it must lead to blob people.

    Also, I am curious that he mentions that brother-sister marriage was normal to the Ancient Egyptians. I'd love to learn more about that, because cross-culturally it is really weird (brother-sister inbreeding seems like an almost universal taboo). From a dynastic, political perspective, I guess it makes sense, Pharaohs (like the Habsburgs and even the Targaryens from Game of Thrones) wouldn't necessarily have gained much from making foreign marriages to other sovereigns much weaker than themselves but had a lot to lose from elevating particular courtiers through marrying into their families or giving them claims to the throne down the line. To use another Game of Thrones example, the Baratheon dynasty didn't benefit much from Lannisters at court…

  5. "… is Ptolemy II, Philadelphos… who has his name after "love of sibling," … Delphos is "brother," but really it should be Philadel*phia*, which is "sister," because he married his sister…"

    Wait, Philadelphia? How does the city figure into this?

  6. Do you want crazy? The men had individual names, but took the name Ptolemy to indicate continuity. You only kept the individual name if you were murdered before you successfully murdered or usurped your way onto the throne.

  7. Cleopatra (the one we know) also married two of her brothers. It may have been symbolic marriage rather than what we think of as marriage. Many gods married their siblings (such as Zeus and Hera) and monarchs would often symbolically marry their siblings to be "God-like." It's sorta like how Roman emperors would "adopt" their presumptive heirs even if they were grown men.

  8. I do not think marrying your sibling was the norm in any way in ancient Egypt as stated in this video.
    Pharaohs did practise it sometimes, but it was nowhere near the level of the Ptolomies.

    Also, it important to note that this practice of marrying one's sibling was also alien to ordinary Egyptians.
    So I don't understand how the whole "Western tradition different from Egyptian" relates to the whole situation.

  9. "Alexander dies drunk at a party — and then THIS [bleep] happens! NO!"

    I always come back to this video just to enjoy your bewildered, very comedic shock.

  10. After Game of Thrones, I think the world is ready for The Ptolemies…. That said the Diadochi period (probably misspelled) is actually pretty interesting.

  11. Blue, that was great and all… but the only thing I'm taking away from this is that Cleopatra (the definitive one) was born in 69 BCE.

  12. After the dumpster fire that is this family bush, can't wait to see how you tackle the swamp water laced sewage line that is the Hapsburgs .

  13. This is my area of study at uni right now I’m so happy you’ve found our cauldron of WEIRD- None of us is sane studying them at this point

  14. This should be a new tv serie called, ptolemy: how i met your sister, daughter, wife, brother, son and husband

  15. Genetically, they're the Hindenburg crashing into the Titanic which is in the middle of Pearl Harbor 8am December 7th 1941. Weird isn't an adjective that applies.

  16. No the Septuagint refers to the seventy theologians who were actually tasked with the actual job of translation.

  17. The Afterlife, Ptolemy family reunion:

    Ptolemy: Hey! Ptolemy!
    Ptolemy: Me?
    Ptolemy: No not you, Ptolemy.
    Ptolemy: Over here!
    Ptolemy: No the Ptolemy nested to Cleopatra.
    Cleopatra: But I'm not next to Ptolemy
    Ptolemy: No! Ugh! Why did we all make each other after ourselves?

  18. I love the enthusiasm and passion for your subject! 🙂 thanks. Dear Gods, thats a lot. LOL Rome grew up though – ish!

  19. So um, hey there, um. Just um, wanted to um, say…um yeah that um this UM video could UM probably be UM like yeah probably half the length if you would UM cut out all the stammering and UMS um yeah but-but you're ok um you're fine um it's cool. Just won't be watching any more vids from you hahaha glad you did your research, though!

  20. It' is harrowing when we look back at history and see how crazy things can be. I suppose these things can be made up but I hold to the subscription that truth is stranger than fiction and ….. wow!

  21. Was there some sort of prophecy or seer or something that said "THERE WILL BE A GREAT QUEEN BORN OF PTOLEMY (gonna leave which number open ended) WHO WILL EXPAND THE EGYPTION EMPIRE AND INFLUENCE. SHE WILL BE INTELLIGENT, CAPTIVATING, WISE, AND MORE POWERFUL THAN ALL THOSE BEFORE HER! HER NAME WILL BE: CLEOPATRA!"

    And they were all like "COOL! I WANNA MARRY/FATHER THAT!" and proceeded to just marry/father every Cleopatra they could find?

  22. Marrying siblings likely had the function of preventing autocratic but not royal lineages or clans from becoming the power behind the throne (as happened in Japan.) Also, it prevented civil wars from one lineage/clan gaining disproportionate power by allying with the throne (as happened under Edward IV with the Woodvilles)

    European monarchs, especially queens, married foreigners expressly to avoid that problem.

    Egyptians were the only civilization forv about 3,000 years so marrying foreigners was out because their weren't any.

    Thus the marrying of royal siblings when internal divisions were to strong for the royal family to ally with one faction.

  23. Ptolemy, this is Ptolemy. Ptolemy, you already know Ptolemy! You two have met before. Ah, yes. Ptolemy, this is Ptolemy and this is Ptolemy.

  24. I think the Egyptian Civil Service might have been running the Kingdom near the end. Potheinos as regent was handling most things for Ptolemy XIII when Julius Caesar arrived in Egypt.

  25. 14:40 Sounding like an Egyptian version of Phil Harris' song "He's His Own Grandpa!"
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_KD7jzOm-VY

  26. So Philadelphia is really named after some ancient, Egyptian, Olympic Gold Medalist-level incest. City of brotherly love, indeed.

  27. Ummm just ewww on the incest. And weeeeeirrrrd on the names. But, having said that, I'm pretty sure their first names were what our last names are today. So it's denoting a family of or "clan of" type word. I guess when they translated the Rosetta Stone they didn't get that.

  28. You and I need to team up and I'll tell you everything about the Ptolemy's I know which is a LOT. Or you can watch the TV series The Cleopatras which is basically the story you just told only with Harry Potters uncle as Ptolemy the Pot Belly.

  29. Technically the Cleopatras that Ptolemy IX and Ptolemy X married were also their sisters, so it was a shame that your lectures never reached Ptolemy XII marrying his cousin/niece Cleopatra V, who herself was born from an uncle-niece couple of Ptolemy X as well. Fun family times…

  30. If the only thing these royals do is do the sex and entertain the public with their antics…
    They are basically the Kardashians of ancient times

  31. Ptolemy VIII (the Fat) was too fat to walk according to visiting Roman dignataries. A lot of the other Ptolemies suffered from swollen eyes and necks due to Graves disease. Not the healthiest family in history. Several generations of incest will do that.

  32. This is why we can't have nice things, Alexander! Leave well enough alone!

    Just kidding. Honestly though, post-Alexander Egypt is a prime example of expectation vs reality. That's wild.

  33. I normally like your videos, but this one doesn’t seem too well put together- it feels like more of a live feed improvised rant.

  34. Well there surely won't be a Game of Thrones show about the Ptolemies. And we thought Cersei and Jaime Lannister were bad. Jeesh.

  35. just talk like a normal fucking person, yes yes we know people back then heavily engaged in incest, its not fucking new.

  36. 3:41 But wait, don't Zeus and Hera have, like, the most destructively dysfunctional marriage in all of Greek mythology? Zeus the cosmos-class serial adulterer/rapist and Hera the vengeful wife who ruins the lives of most of his mistresses/victims and (")love(") children? I mean, Aphrodite cheats on Hephaistos but it just results in a bunch of lesser gods and Aeneas (and that one bit in the Odyssey where Hephaistos booby-traps his bed to catch them… that was fun for 12-year-old me to reimagine as something goofy and clean). I'd agree with you, Blue: Zeus and Hera are the last couple (fictional or not) known in Ptolemy's time that you would want to compare a real-life couple to.

  37. This all happened because they had some really nice monogrammed towels and nobody wanted to give them up so they just took the names of their family members.

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