Mafia Microphone

Mafia Microphone


>>NOW WE GOT ANOTHER SHIPMENT OF DIAMONDS
COMING IN DOWN BY THE HUDSON TONIGHT AT 2:00
SO I NEED ALL OF YOUS TO BE THERE.>>YEAH, THAT WORKS OUT PERFECT.
‘CAUSE I’M BRINGING IN AN ASSOCIATE DOWN THERE FOR A SWIM.
GOT ‘EM A NEW PAIR OF CONCRETE ALL-STARS IF YOU KNOW WHAT I’M SAYING.>>NICE JIMMY.
SHORTY, CAN YOU MAKE IT?>>YEAH, I’LL BE THERE BOSS.
>>GOOD. JOHNNY, WHAT ABOUT YOU?
JOHNNY? YOU WITH ME?
YOU LOOK A LITTLE JUMPY.>>OH YEAH, FORGET ABOUT IT.
I’LL BE THERE.>>GOOD.
NOW SHORTY HERE’S GOT SOME NEWS FROM OUR FRIENDS FROM ACROSS TOWN.
>>OH I GOT SOME JUICY NEWS. EAST SIDE TOMMY AND HIS BOYS
PULLED A HEIST IN OUR NEIGHBORHOOD LAST NIGHT.
I GETS WINDS TO THIS AND GOES TO TOMMY AND SAYS, “DID YOU– DID YOU FORGET THIS OUR TURF?”>>RIGHT.
>>YOU KNOW, TOMMY’S MEMORY CAN BE A LITTLE SPOTTY. SO I SENT A FEW BOYS OVER TO REFRESHEN IT FOR HIM.>>JOHNNY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?>>WHO, ME?
OH FORGET ABOUT IT. I JUST THOUGHT I SAW SOMEONE I KNEW,
BUT TURNED OUT TO BE SHORTY AND HIS HAIR, WHICH LOOKS GREAT BY THE WAY.
>>YEAH.>>WELL, JUST SIT DOWN.
GO ON. NOW, WHILE YOU ALL REMEMBER
SONNY AND HIS BOYS?>>RIGHT.
>>WELL SONNY HASN’T PAID FOR THE SERVICES THAT WE RENDERED.
>>AH TYPICAL.>>SO, I STOPPED BY AND GAVE HIM
A LITTLE LESSON IN ECONOMICS.>>AND BY THAT YOU MEAN YOU KILLED HIM RIGHT?
>>UH, LET’S JUST SAY THAT I SENT HIM ON VACATION. YOU KNOW, SIX FEET UNDER GROUND.>>SIX FEET UNDER.
>>WHICH WE ALL KNOW IS AN ANALOGY FOR–>>JOHNNY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
>>YOU KNOW, SHIMMY TO THE RIGHT OR SHIMMY TO THE LEFT.
YOU KNOW, FORGET ABOUT IT.>>WELL, WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU JOHNNY?
WHY YOU ACTING SO SHADY?>>WELL I JUST THINK SOMETIMES
WE GO A LITTLE HEAVY ON THE METAPHORS WHEN IT
WOULD BE NICE IF WE JUST SIMPLY STATED WHAT HAPPENED.
YOU KNOW? IN DETAIL.
>>WELL, GO SIT DOWN.>>HEY, FORGET ABOUT IT.
>>YOU KNOW, IF I DIDN’T KNOW ANY BETTER–>>YOU GUYS!
YOU GUYS! THIS IS BAD!
THIS IS BAD!>>HEY WHAT’S GOING ON MICK?
>>WELL I WAS TALKING TO POLLY AT LUNCH TODAY, YOU KNOW ABOUT OUR UNDERGROUND GAMBLING OPERATION…
>>YEAH.>>YEAH, AND HOW IS THAT GOING BY THE WAY?
>>[MOUTH CLICK]>>YOU KNOW, THE VISUALS AREN’T REALLY HELPING ME.
COULD YOU VERBALLY ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR WRONG DOINGS?>>WHAT?>>HEY, I GOT AN IDEA.
WHY DON’T WE ALL GO AROUND THE ROOM, STATE OUR FULL LEGAL GIVEN NAMES,
AND SAY ALL THE BAD THINGS WE’VE EVER DONE. ALL RIGHT?
YOU GO FIRST.>>YOU KNOW BOYS, I’M STARTING TO SMELL SOMETHING.
>>YEAH, WELL THAT’S WHY I’M HERE. YOU KNOW POLLY SAYS TODAY,
HE SAYS, “HEY MICKEY, “WORD ON THE STREET IS ONE OF YOUR GUYS IS A RAT.”>>OH NO!
WHOA! WHOA A RAT?
OH FORGET ABOUT IT. YOU KNOW, I HATE TO THINK ABOUT
WHAT THAT GUYS GOT COMING TO HIM. HE’S PROBABLY GOT A WIFE AND KIDS AT HOME.
YOU KNOW PROBABLY GOES TO ALL THE KID’S BASKETBALL PRACTICES.
AND EVERY MORNING THE KID PROBABLY SAYS TO HIM, “DADDY, WHEN I GROW UP, “I WANT TO BE AN UNDERCOVER
COP JUST LIKE YOU!” YOU KNOW?>>HEY.
>>AND UH, HE PROBABLY SAID TO HIM THIS MORNING, “DADDY, I GOT A BAD “FEELING ABOUT TODAY.
“YOU KNOW, “YOU SHOULDN’T GO INTO WORK. YOU SHOULD CALL IN SICK.”
AND THAT KID, PROBABLY REACHED UP TOUCHED HIS DADDY’S MOUSTACHE FOR WHAT
MAY BE THE LAST TIME. YOU KNOW I JUST FEEL LIKE I CAN
RELATE TO THAT. YOU KNOW HE PROBABLY THINKS IF
HE JUST KEEPS ON TALKING EVERYONE’S JUST GOING
TO FORGET ABOUT IT. YOU KNOW, IT WOULD BE A SHAME IF
SOMETHING HAPPENED TO HIM. FORGET ABOUT IT.
>>WELL BOYS I THINK WE KNOW WHO THE RAT IS.>>FBI, FREEZE!
>>PUT YOUR HANDS WHERE WE CAN SEE THEM!>>IT’S ABOUT TIME YOU GUYS SHOWED UP.
WE GOT ENOUGH EVIDENCE TO PUT THESE BOYS AWAY FOR LIFE.
>>JIMMY, YOU’RE THE RAT?>>SORRY, YOU GUYS ARE CRIMINALS.
IT’S MY JOB.>>WHAT ABOUT JOHNNY?
>>YEAH, THAT GUY IS JUST A FREAK WITH NO PERSONAL SPACE.>>HEY, YOU THINK BOTH OF US COULD FIT IN YOUR JACKET AT THE SAME TIME?
>>NO, WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?>>HEY, AND UNFORTUNATELY THE JAIL
IS A LITTLE CROWDED RIGHT NOW. SO ALL OF YOUS ARE GOING TO HAVE
SHARE A JAIL CELL.>>HEY SILVER LINING GUYS!
>>UH, FORGET ABOUT IT!>>WHAT IS HAPPENING?
>>ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT, ONE AT A TIME.

100 thoughts on “Mafia Microphone

  1. m̸a̸t̸t̸ s̸o̸u̸n̸d̸s̸ l̸i̸k̸e̸ m̸a̸t̸t̸ f̸r̸o̸m̸ t̸e̸a̸m̸ e̸d̸g̸e̸ ❣️❣️💕❤️💋💖

  2. Is it bad that the beginning reminded me of the last episode of riverdale season two where they're all meeting in the white wyrm?

  3. i love scrolling through the comments and seeing all the different ways people are spelling "forget about it" sjdhgs

  4. "Why don't we all go around the room, state our full legal-given names, and say all the bad things we've ever done."
    Got 'em.

  5. Anyone else rewatch the video just to count the number of times Jeremy said forget about it? No? Just me? Kay, lonely forever then

  6. Is it just me or is it that if someone else did the sketch, Adam would be the guy smoking a cigar/cigarette?

  7. “Hey Mickey, word on the street is one of you guys is a rat”
    Was that on purpose? The Mickey *Mouse*? A *rat*?

  8. James: so you guys are gonna hafta share a cell
    Jeremy: hey silver lining guys
    All: UGH forget about it
    I DIED

  9. Plot twist: James and Jeremy were both undercover cops, but Jeremy acted strange so he'd divert all attention away from James

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